Expert Blog Compelling advice, stories, and thought-provoking perspectives straight from YourTango's lineup of Experts to you

How The Silent Treatment Kills Your


Him: “What’d I do? Come on, tell me – what’d I do?!”

You: Deploying your most potent weapon: The Silent Treatment.

You know what he did. You know perfectly well what he did. You want him to figure it out for himself.

Why should you have to tell him what he did? If he doesn’t know, it’s that much worse!

You bear down. You can keep this up for daaaaaays.

I know you can, but here’s the problem: the silent treatment kills. Not him (that would be OK with you at the moment) but the trust between you, the closeness, and eventually, the intimacy.

Why would you do that? That’s the opposite of what you want! So loosen those lips, get those words flowing, and let him know how you’re hurt, what frightened you, where you’re at.

Now there’s a possibility of healing, and isn’t that ducky . . .

More at



Expert advice

If you keep finding yourself in heartbreaking, dead end relationships, listen up.
Several key behaviors stand out in order to help couples create a healthy relationship.
It seems like you can't do anything right.

Explore YourTango