Like it or not, dating is a game. Play your cards right and you'll land a great man!
A man recently posted a comment on my blog saying (and I quote with disgust and embarrassment): "Bad advice, babe. Men are only interested in finding p*ssy!"
Um. This type of man will push you for sex on the first date, and if you refuse, you'll never hear from him again. (BTW: Good riddance, babe!) Fortunately, this dirtbag is a horrible exception and not the rule.
I believe that most men truly are looking for a genuine relationship with the right woman and they basically respect and value women. Sexual compatibility is important, but that's just one component to making his attraction last.
So, why do men desire, respect and pursue some women and not others? What is the magic allure that causes a man to prefer one special woman over his buddies, fall in love and seriously consider marriage?
Scientists claim it takes 8.2 seconds for a man to decide if he's interested in woman, and if you ask me, the following seven qualities have everything to do with it:
1. Have true style
Men are visual creatures and they're drawn to a woman's polished appearance and femininity. The primary visual factors that get a man’s attention are your eyes, what you’re wearing, how your hair looks, your perfume and, depending on his taste, your body shape. After that, quality men look for more vital and enduring traits.
2. Be warm and approachable
Eye contact and a genuine smile are powerful flirting tools that capture a man’s initial attention. A quick glance, a soft smile and a slow look away lets a man know you're interested. Casually glimpse at him now and then, catch his gaze, touch your hair and look down. One study showed that it takes 13 glances before the average guy gets the courage to approach a woman.
3. Always be your authentic self
Men really do want to make an emotional connection with a woman. Authentic means you share your true thoughts, you truly listen to what he's saying, and you’re not afraid to show your vulnerable side and share your flaws. A woman who is authentic is in her best self, and your best self will bring out the best in a man.
4. Be your own person (with your own interests)
You're busy, successful and self-reliant. You love your life, enjoy your career and have your own interests and hobbies. You have solid relationships with your family and friends, and you’re socially active. You don’t need a man to complete you, but you would welcome and enjoy the right man into your life.
5. Keep your attitude positive
In the beginning, men just want to have a good time, and they're turned off if you're too serious. If you are upbeat and engaging, a man can have fun with you. If you're authentic, he's more apt to relax show you his true self, which makes him want to spend more time with you. A light-hearted attitude is an indicator that you're easy to get along with — even when the relationship gets serious.
6. Maintain an air of mystery
A woman who doesn’t immediately reveal the intimate details of her life intrigues men. Women who divulge their hurtful past and personal problems on the first date dilute their attractiveness and allure. A tinge of mystique can challenge a man's prowess, making him WANT to know you better. But don’t act evasive, scheming or play jealous mind games because then he won't trust you and will pull away.
7. Don't rush into sex
It’s the allure of sex (the first time) that inflames a man’s desire to pursue a woman. Saying “no” to sex in the early stages of dating is not a manipulative ploy, it simply means (in addition to protecting yourself from STDs) that you understand a man thinks with the bulge in his trousers at this point in the relationship, and not his brain or his heart.
Men need time to develop feelings and trust for a woman. When a woman caves in for sex too soon, he may lose interest and respect for you and his motivation for the chase.
Read the true story of how author Nancy Nichols discovered the attitude that gains the sincere interest and pursuit of quality men in Secrets of the Ultimate Husband Hunter.
This article was originally published at www.knowitallnancy.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.