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Just don't.
By Netia Everett — Written on Jul 29, 2016
Communication should be prominent in relationships. Sometimes, we tend to forget that the type of communication and how we address our concerns are just as important. In other words, there are things to keep in mind when talking to your man. So instead of focusing on the things you need to talk about, I thought I should point out the things women should never say to a man.
1. Does your mom really need to stay with us while she visits?
Some women have loving relationships with their in-laws or boyfriend's mother. But for those who don't, never diss mom! Ever! In your man's eyes she's as good as gold. One sure way to ruin any relationship is by talking about someone's mother, especially when it's your man's mom.
Most men unknowingly look for a woman with similar characteristics to their mother when choosing their future spouse. So putting down mom can be a touchy subject, especially if your man has a good relationship with her. Although you may not want her around, grit your teeth and smile. Chances are she's doing the same thing with you for her son's sake.
2. Um, are you there yet?
Let's face it, there are times when you may feel this way. You've got plenty on your mind. You've got too many things to do and you're too distracted to be 100% in the moment with him. Even if you aren't there emotionally, yet alone, sexually try not to let him know it.
Obviously, this may not just bruise his ego, this could crush it altogether as you're clearly not into him or what he's doing for you. Anytime you let a man know that you're not into the lovin' he's giving you, you leave wounds that aren’t always easily reparable.
Besides, when you really let go, you may actually find yourself enjoying the moment. So leave your thoughts behind, momentarily and get busy already!
3. Hey, are you in there yet?
Damn! There aren't too many ways he could ever recover from that remark. Letting any man know that his package just isn't adequate enough for you will only increase tension among you two and I don't mean that in a good way.
4. Really? You're already done?
This may strike his ego a bit harshly. We all know that most men tend to enjoy themselves then fall asleep a bit faster than we women would like. But pointing out this fact doesn't help matters either. Instead, do what you can to prolong the moment and tell him to hold off on coming for a little while. This lets him know that you're enjoying it way too much to let it end.
5. Are you sure you need that second helping?
Believe it or not, men can be just as concerned about their weight and sex-appeal as women. They may not make a huge deal out of it the same way that women do, but trust me, they notice their weight gain. They don't need you to point out their love handles or beer gut to them, any more than we need them to point at all of our flaws. If you're uncomfortable with their weight gain, suggest calorie-burning exercises that you can do together.
6. What's up with your hair?
Again, men are sensitive about their looks, including their hair. So if they've undergone a bad haircut, or their receding hair line has become more visible, as of late, don't point this out. Try to suggest other things they can do to offset this new look that may or may not be there to stay. A change in facial hair or better clothing could help offset the new look you aren't so fond of, while letting your man know that you're still attracted to his other features.
7. Are you ever going to put a ring on it, or what?
Chances are, you already know the answer to this question. A man who plans to propose drops hints in everyday conversation, such as discussing plans to move in together, plans to buy a house together, plans to meet family and friends for get-togethers, plans for future vacations, and so on.
If none of this has happened throughout your relationship (this typically happens in relationships lasting longer than a few months) then he probably doesn't feel that your relationship has a real future. Not to mention, the last thing you want is a proposal based off of the pressure he feels from your insistence.
If he never talks about a future that includes you, or never shows any signs that he is preparing to pop the big question, such as dropping hints about not spending as much so that he can save money for your future, then you know what needs to be done.
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