Wanna Know How To Be His Dream Lover?


Wanna Know How To Be His Dream Lover?
If you want to know what really turns him on and makes sex with you memorable, read this!

So, if you are also shy and ashamed of your sexuality, let me, right now, give you permission not to be shy and not to worry about LOOKING pleased as much as actually BEING pleased. Many men can feel the difference between you putting on airs and you authentically getting aroused.

Tell yourself, “Kristina gives me permission to be a free girl in the bedroom. She gives me permission to be self-invested in the bedroom, because that’s really what HE wants. She gives me permission to let my wildest fantasies play on the playground of my imagination anytime I want. She says that to be a sexual woman is not a sin, so my body is free from sexual shame.”

Also, enjoying sex fully can be much harder with a guy you DON’T really know well. When you have sex with someone you don’t feel emotionally safe with, your body is less likely to surrender to that person’s touch and sex. You end up performing instead of experiencing!

A good test to know if your body feels safe with someone is to think about whether or not you would leave that person alone in your house when you weren’t there. If you can’t trust a man with your television set, why on earth would you trust him alone in your bedroom with your beautiful, precious, naked body?

Look, I’m not against casual sex, but just remember that you want a healthy mind and body that are attracted to (and surrender fully to) safety and love, not to precarity and anatomy.

Here are some suggestions to help you feel more sexual and in your body and start authentically CRAVING, LOVING, NEEDING, and ENJOYING your man’s sex:

Don’t beat yourself up for the ways you’ve acted sexually with men in the past. You are still alive and your heart is still beating with love to give! Don’t let a memory take away your soul’s spirit and your desire to experience sexual bliss. Forget that drunken night in the back seat of that weird guy’s car, because we almost all have a memory like that, and start thinking about the kind of lovemaking you want to have now and in the future.

STOP reading articles about how to give mind-blowing oral sex. How are you going to focus on your pleasure if you are preoccupied with figuring out how to make one hand move one way, the other move the other way, and your mouth go up and down, all at the same time? His penis isn’t a shake weight. He wants you to enjoy what you are doing, not stress out.

SURRENDER to your man’s non-sexual affection as often as you can. I often use the image of butter on a hot metal knife, where you are the butter and his touch is the knife's blade. Melt into his tenderness. Make a conscious effort to relax your muscles when he touches you, and start outside the bedroom. Allow yourself to look into his eyes and silently say to him, “That feels like heaven, you beautiful man.” Or say it aloud.

Let HIM undress you in bed. With every item of clothing he removes, surrender to his touch, an aspect of your vulnerability.

Don’t primp and fuss over putting on stiff, itchy lingerie for him that makes YOU feel anything but sensual. Wear WHATEVER makes you feel deliciously fleshy and carnal.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Ms. Kristina Marchant


Is the man you love emotionally distant?  Maybe he runs hot then cold, or maybe he has slowly been distancing himself over time?  If so, you are have something in common with the women who read and follow my blog,  Come take a look and sign up there for my free mini-course: "Why Men Fall In & Out Of Love...  And What You Can Do"



Location: Miami, FL
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Ms. Kristina Marchant:

How To Spot & Release Emotionally Unavailable Men


A relationship when both partners are "all-in" is tough enough. But when your man is emotionally unavailable, things are so much harder. You're committed to making things work, but he just won't open up. A tell-tale sign of an emotionally unavailable man is a lack of empathy; check for these signs before you get too committed. Although my ... Read more

Angling For A Proposal? Here's How To Reel Him In


You love him and you know he's the one; he says he loves you but admits he's not sure if you're his forever woman. Ouch. This not only hurts like hell — it's maddening. In your heart, you know that he loves you and would be miserable without you in his life, but your head tells you that you're acting like a fool, waiting around ... Read more

How To Act When He Needs Space


Is the man you love acting like a ghost in your relationship?  Maybe he's even vocalized that he needs space? Perhaps he claims nothing's wrong, but he just doesn't return your texts and seems to be a whole lot busier than he was in the early stages of dating? Before you convince yourself that he has one foot out of the relationship, ask ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Cocktail Lady

Pick The Right Guy Why Hot Guys Don't Last

How to tell the difference between Mr. Right and Mr. Last Night. Find out when you're getting warm.

Gay Dating

7 Things I've Learned About Men As a Matchmaker

You'll be surprised to see which myths about men have been busted!

Spa Retreat

The Pursuit of Peace

Peace is a journey not a destination. It represents a gift you give yourself.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>