Usually when we have obsessive thoughts we want to find a solution. It’s very important that you refrain from trying to find a way to solve your issues and hook him back in. The next time you find yourself obsessing over solutions, stop yourself in your tracks and make a pact with yourself that you will not do anything for the relationship or for him.
Refrain from buying him things, calling and texting him, asking him if he needs any emotional support or catering to him with home-cooked meals and date plans.
Instead just “sit on your hands” and do nothing. Give yourself a soul want, but don’t do anything to yank him toward you.
See, he wants you to be available but he doesn’t want you chasing him down. Give him a chance to come toward you. Even if he’s somewhat emotionally unavailable, and you feel like he will forget about you if you don’t jump hoops to keep yourself in front of his face, I promise you that he will feel safer coming toward you if you back off. Trust that you are enough and stay still.
Holiday Love Tip #3 Be A Great Receiver
Once you are self-providing soul wants and sitting on your hands, you have to make sure to stay emotionally available to receiving his attention and affection.
I promise that he will come closer as you ease off and let him near you. Ever try to coax a stray kitty from under a car? You have to give it space. He's like a kitty and needs you to let him come closer at his pace.
When he comes close, be welcoming. Be available to hear what he has to say or to answer his questions about how you’ve been. Don’t jump to fill in all the silences, but play an easy game of tennis with him where he asks and question and then you do.
When he says something that appeals to you, tell him; “That was sweet of you to say.” When he does something to upset you, tell him that, too; “You know, I feel really upset that you haven’t called for a few days.”
I know you’re afraid that he will think you're needy if you tell him how he upsets you, but if you continue to sit on your hands and simply voice your truth with an open heart, he’ll realize that you're no pushover and that will make your price tag SOAR!
Also By Kristina: Red Rose Woman: The Enchantress Inside You