Are you struggling to find romance in your life? The answer could be found at the click of a button
I'm probably going to show my age here, but back in the old days when I was a dating young adult, I met potential dates in a limited number of ways. Dating guys you met at work was usually out of the question, but if the chemistry was there, it might be possible to follow through on - romance is where you find it, after all. I was taking classes at a community college at the time, and I certainly took advantage of the potential there for romance - on breaks and before and after class there was always the possibility of meeting a guy with dating possibilities.
I wasn't really a church goer, but I had girlfriends who swore that social get-togethers held at their churches were excellent ways to meet guys. And of course, there was the bar scene - always a drag in many ways, but there was really no substitute for it. Where else could you check out an uninhibited crowd, weed them out based on your own criteria, make an evaluation according to lameness of opening lines and close-up looks, and chalk it up to experience if it didn't work out?
But those times are long gone, and so many things have changed. Romances at work are either frowned upon, or forbidden entirely and punishable by termination - no fun at all, even if you're sneaking around after work.
Taking classes at any kind of college is serious business these days - an investment in an uncertain future. So many men and women have their noses so close to the grindstone that they don't notice any kind of attention being directed their way, and time is too tight for socializing after class. As for church, maybe the opportunities are still there, but I've heard too many tragic tales of over-bearing controlling men who only come out after the first or second date. No, thanks.
But now we have online dating, the new way to find romance - or is it? For any of you who have been disconnected from modern technology for the last few years, it works like this: you as the romance-seeker sign up with a reputable and popular online dating site, you set up your profile - which sounds easy but is actually a labor-intensive process, because you want to get it right. For some people, just finding the words to describe themselves and their interests objectively yet attractively is very difficult. Then there are the photos - you'll need a head shot, a full-length pic, and maybe a couple of action photos showing you in a favourite activity.
After you've got a profile up, you're ready to be connected with potential dates - that's what the service does for you. So far it's mostly a way to find possibly compatible dates, and it isn't very different from meeting people in other ways - except that you can count on at least an initial match with a guy in interests, personality and other criteria you've set up.
The great thing about finding romance this way is that you can take the whole process offline by making contact by phone when you feel ready to take it to the next level. You can actually have a conversation with the person you've met online before an in-person meeting, kind of the opposite of the old ways.
The experts say to try out this new way to find romance, take it seriously, but don't expect too much. It seems that because a match has been made, some romance seekers assume they've found Mr. Right, and take it way too fast. If you can be sensible and careful, online dating can be the way to romance, and it has many advantages over those old-fashioned methods.