Porn Is Happening..

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Porn Is Happening..
Porn exists for a reason. Instead of trying to justify or nullify it, let us take a realistic look.

Porn is happening. Porn is everywhere. Porn can be light and for fun, or porn can be a multi billion dollar profit for some and detrimentally expensive for others. So, I'd like to start off this by saying that pornography in and of itself is not a ‘bad’ thing. We have preconceived notions about porn being something bad. Men feel guilty about it. Women feel threatened by it. And it exists for a reason right? It wouldn't be such a gi-normous industry if people didn't love it. But gosh darnit, if too many people weren't basing their understanding of real life sex based on a bunch of sexy actors and actresses faking it. 

I want to talk a little bit about why porn is good, and why porn is bad. At the core, I believe that everything in moderation is the best format to follow. And a little bit of porn should be fine, as long as it’s not interfering with your sex life, social life, finances, job, relationship, family, responsibilities and so on. (Read: Most mental health professionals will in fact determine whether or not something is considered an addiction, or if someone is addicted based on the aforementioned variables of responsibilities. If something is being affected, such as any or all of job, relationship, family, money, chances are the individual has a problem or addiction, and will likely be treated as such by the mental health professional.)

So, with that said, we are long overdue to begin to wonder how the internet’s biggest industry Porn, which continues to infiltrate our relationships, our sex lives, our bedrooms, not to mention the lives of teenagers, who have the highest porn viewing statistics, and so much more continues to thrive, when it seems to have so many negative connotations? How can 63 million viewers be so wrong*? As a sex educator, I feel that a lot of it has to do with our attitudes about sex. Naturally, when we don’t feel comfortable talking about something, that we already feel we know so little about, and ill-equipped to talk about, read: yes, I am talking about Sex, its presence, in a highly graphic manner is going to intrigue us. Hence we are enticed to watch such movies and videos. But on the flipside, the messages we were sent growing up about masturbation, sex and nudity, and the silence we were fed when it came to anal sex, girl-on-girl or man-on-man sex, group sex or orgies, and sodomy may also lead to anxiety about what we see, which can lead to the on the better end, aforementioned feelings of guilt, and full blown addictions on the worst-case-scenario end. And these pornographic movies are not based in reality.

But still for many porn is still a healthy viable option. For example, for couples, porn can be a positive thing. Porn can be an igniter, a sexual interest peaker, initiator, instigator, something to shake things up, or make things more exciting. Couples who use it may do so as they might use sex toys, erotic stories, trips to the adult store and more to keep life in the bedroom more exciting. Porn can be an effective addition to role-playing and fantasy play, to erotic storytelling or just plain and simply getting the mind out of the doldrums of the day to day life and bringing some excitement at the end of the day.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Moushumi Ghose

Sex Therapist

Moushumi Ghose, MFT specializes in sex and relationships and is based in New York City and Los Angeles.

She is the host of The Sex Talk, a web-series dedicated to raising awarenes about sex, and sexuality, and has made several TV and media appearances including Hollywood Today The Girl Spot, Durex Condoms and Investigation Discoveries as a sex expert. 

Visit her website at www.LASexTherapist.com

Subscribe to The Sex Talk Series at www.TheSexTalkSeries.com

Listen to podcasts at Sex, Love and Rock 'N' Roll Radio.

Mou is the author of Marriage, Money and Porn, available on Amazon, and is currently writing her second book, about non-monogamous sex. 

Follow Moushumi on Twitter @MoushumiAmour and Facebook

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: LMFT, MA, MFT
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