Is This Chemical Messing Up Your Love Life?

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how oxytocin is ruining your relationships
The so-called 'love hormone' may be why you fall head over heels in love too quickly.

When you feel the oxytocin, dopamine, testosterone or whichever chemical reactor is making you feel pathologically, possessively or obsessively attached to someone who doesn't seem to be giving you back quite as much, it means it's time to relax. Be a friend. Allow the relationship to unfold in its own time.

Do you even want what you think you want? Take a deep breath, focus on yourself, take a walk, go for a jog, take a yoga class and remind yourself there are other forces at work here. What you crave and desire, you will only push away by clinging too hard. People want to feel appreciated, and genuinely liked before they will respond in jest.

 

I think this whole concept that there are hormones responsible for our attachments is fine, but I like to remind people we are also in control of how we respond to emotions and feelings within our bodies. While you may feel compelled to hound the object of our affections down as a result of chemicals in your brain, you have to stop and think: "Is this really what I want?"

Moushumi Ghose is a sex and relationship therapist and expert, based in Los Angeles. She is the host of The Sex Talk. Connect with her on Facebook or Twitter.

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Moushumi Ghose

Sex Therapist

Moushumi Ghose, MFT specializes in sex and relationships and is based in New York City and Los Angeles.

Mou is the host of The Sex Talk, a web-series dedicated to raising awarenes about sex, and sexuality, and has made several TV and media appearances including Hollywood Today The Girl Spot, Durex Condoms and Investigation Discoveries as a sex expert. 

Mou is the band leader, composer and voice of the rock band Ghosha.

Visit her website at www.LASexTherapist.com

Subscribe to The Sex Talk Series at www.TheSexTalkSeries.com

Listen to podcasts at Sex, Love and Rock 'N' Roll Radio.

Mou is the author of Marriage, Money and Porn, available on Amazon, and is currently writing her second book, about non-monogamous sex. 

 

Follow Moushumi on Twitter @MoushumiAmour and Facebook

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: LMFT, MA, MFT
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