Sex Education: What We Didn't Learn in School


Sex Education: What We Didn't Learn in School
Real sex education is taught in the bedroom, not the classroom.

Ah, sex education: those two weeks in fifth grade when we all squirmed, gaped, and tried so hard to quiet the giggles that came out every time our teacher uttered the word penis or period (quick, think of something sad!). We learned about the birds, the bees, and the many STD’s. But, as much as sex education claims to educate, the truth is it really did anything but.

Now, it's still a vital part of cirriculum: if nothing else, it helps teach adolescents to make smart choices. Yet, it doesn't educate us on sex's true essence. 

The reason for this is simple: true sex education involves more than learning about hormones and watching after school specials where Sally gets the herps from sleeping with the entire high school football team. Instead, sex education is about things that can’t be taught in school…and certainly shouldn’t be taught in the fifth grade.

I’m not talking about positions or technique; rather, I’m talking about the following tiny, but ever important, tidbits:

Men and women view sex differently: Men and women have always had, and probably always will have, inherently different views when it comes to sex. Men tend to view it more casually, while women are more likely to tie it with emotions. Perhaps because of this, men are more likely to sleep with a woman they don’t really know that well, whereas women are much more likely to only sleep with someone they care about. And, as every single made for TV movie has taught us, women equate sex with love and committment much more often than men. 

Sexual affairs aren’t usually about sex: When a husband or a wife finds themselves reserving a room at Hal’s Happy Endings, the local hotel on route 96 that books by the hour, people assume that it is purely for reasons that are sexual. Yet, the truth remains that only a very small percent of people have affairs because of sexual dissatisfaction. Far more often they have them because of emotional dissatisfaction.

There is a double standard: Women have long pointed out the double standard that exists between the genders. Though younger men may pass this off as women being paranoid (and older men may pass it off as them having the “Vapors”), the facts support the feminine argument: in a 2013 survey reported by Psychology Today, more than a quarter of men said they would lose respect for a woman who engages in casual sex but would not lose respect for a man who does the same. These men may be in the minority, but they still prove that a double standard exists somewhat.

Article contributed by

Michael Griswold

Relationship Coach

Michael Griswold

To Get Help With Your Relationship Now, Click Here...

Location: Norfolk, VA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Michael Griswold:

The 5 Things Women Notice About Men Right Away


The question of how to attract women naturally is one that some men answer more easily than others. Some can get a phone number with little more than a smile; others can only get a phone number when they pretend to work for the US Census Bureau. At the root of this, it seems unfair, unfair that women all but throw themselves at some men while never noticing ... Read more

Reconciling With An Ex: What To Do Before, During, And After


How to get your ex back: it's a question many people ask themselves right after a breakup. You may be determined, resolved in your goal to change yourself and become more appealing. Or you may be almost vengeful, hell bent on showing your ex exactly what they are missing. Then there’s the chance you are simply at your wit's end, desperate to ... Read more

Love Thyself: 5 Ways To Find Your Confidence


Dating, marriage, sustaining any type of relationship — romantic, platonic, familial, or business — it all takes confidence, confidence in your partner, confidence in others, but, most importantly, confidence in yourself. In fact, not knowing how to love yourself can, alone, cause a relationship to resemble something out of reality TV ... Read more

See More


Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.