Are Girl Friend Breakups Worse Than Boy Friend Breakups?


Are Girl Friend Breakups Worse Than Boy Friend Breakups?
How your brain is trained to avoid the heartache of breakups and what you can do to untie the knot.

It is the fear of revisiting the hurt feelings from that decade that drives the irrational behavior of single women claiming to be ready for love but experiencing the exact opposite.  From poor partner choices and over accommodating to physical abuse, fear of being hurt runs the show.

As intoxicating as it is to experience the chemicals that are released when you have a deep crush on someone, the opposite is equally as dramatic on the young girl's psyche.  When that first love it always does, the brain releases floods of distress chemicals which trigger physical reactions that are frightening.

This 'hurt-feelings feeling' is triggered by a flood of brain chemicals driven by a deeply internal part of the brain.  The reason the brain behaves this way is simply the mechanical design of your body.  It has nothing to do with what is happening to you.  Strong inner alarm bells are going off and the hurt feelings are stopping your business as usual and changing your direction.

Part of what feels so terrible when heartbreak strikes is how awful you feel physically.  Everyone has a unique hurt-feelings feeling.  When you get hit by the inner hurricane of stress chemicals, the body is in distress, right?  There is pain, pressure, heat or some sign in the body.

When something happens that hurts my feelings, my upper left chest aches.  Like a hot knife is parked there, I can feel a burning that goes up and down in intensity depending on what is going on around me.  I also feel an ache in my ears and jaw and my throat tightens up.

Whether I get a critical review on something I wrote, overhear someone saying something cold about me, be overlooked by my family on my birthday,  or when a friend disappears, the same hurt-feelings feeling happens.  Even writing about it brings the feeling to me right now, 

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