Use Your Social Life To Get The Love Life You Crave

By , ,

couple dancing at a party
How changing your social mindset can lead to success in your search for love.

If you're single: do you dream of dating a rock climber but spend all your free time playing games online? If you're coupled up, do you leave an evening with friends feeling encouraged or downtrodden? If you're not enthused about where you are or who you're with, you're probably not making you or your partner happy. If certain activities or relationships aren't helping you live your best love life, it's time to reevaluate—and taking a break from them is a good place to start. Here's how to do it. 5 Things Single Women Hate To Hear

If you're in a relationship…
As an expert in this area, what I can tell you is this: relationship success takes time and ALL success is related to your attitude. Maintaining a positive attitude when you're searching for or building a relationship is the key to making it happen.

It's hard to sustain your positivity when what you want isn't happening. My advice: don't give up! Lighten up, smile and remember that the truth is simple, but rarely is it easy. When you start to doubt, the best and most appropriate action is to stop doing what isn't working. My suggestion, make this a time to date yourself.

Start doing more of what makes you and your partner happy. Do you love sleeping in? Watching old movies? Maybe you truly value a clean home and an uncluttered environment? Are you inspired by nature? Love to take a walk in the woods or listen to the birds sing? Maybe you feel motivated by beauty, art, or music? Or perhaps helping other people inspires you?

Whatever activities make you feel the most pampered, the most loved and the most cherished are the things to do now.

By reconnecting with your higher, more loving selves, you remove the "neediness" and negativity that arise when we're feeling less than. Use these reconnection retreats whenever you find negativity arising in your relationship.

Dr. Liz Zed, Counselor/Therapist

If you're single…
Savvy singles should determine whether a social activity is an opportunity or a threat to their love lives. Think location, location, location. Where does your "target market" hang out or even buy their groceries? It's not just about where you go that counts, but what you do when you get there. Engage in social activities that attract large numbers of like-minded people in settings where you are comfortable being proactive in meeting them.

Date with integrity. Choose activities that speak to who you truly are. Don't pursue a hobby just because it will help you meet men or women. Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you. Don't attempt to find potential dates with anyone who overshadows you or depresses you.

Blend the online with the offline. Try Meetup.com or Howaboutwe.com. If that fails, take classes at the Learning Annex, go to events listed in Time Out or throw a dinner party that requires everyone to bring a single (platonic) friend. 365 Days Of Online Dating

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Melanie Gorman

Business Coach

Melanie Gorman, M.A.

SR. VP YourTango Experts

http://www.yourtango.com

www.twitter.com/melanie360

Melanie@yourtango.com

Phone: 410-923-6905

Location: Crownsville, MD
Credentials: MA
Specialties: Career, Communication Problems, Empowering Women
Other Articles/News by Melanie Gorman:

Let’s Be Real, Is It Impossible To Be Monogamous?

By , , , ,

Monogamy has been a controversial topic for quite some time. While some insist that monogamy is unnatural and outdated, other skeptics reject the overall notion of falling in love with and committing to just one person, going as far as to say that the state of monogamy is entirely impossible. Is being in a monogamous relationship  really that ... Read more

Falling Slowly: The Science Behind Staying In Love

By , , , ,

If you've ever worried about where you and your partner are heading or whether the love you share will survive the many hurtles thrown your way, you're not alone. Limiting yourself to falling in and out of love without ever allowing yourself the option to stop and really think about everything going on will only harm you in the long run. No matter how ... Read more

War Of Words: What's The Difference Between Intimacy & Sexuality?

By , , , ,

Relationships are confusing enough and the terms we correlate with them only add to the confusion. Two terms we often mistake for one another are sexuality and intimacy. While they may seem to go hand in hand, in reality these terms are both very different. Relationship experts Mary Kay Cocharo, Larry Michel, Lou ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB