to the YourTango newsletter!

Continue to Site »»

ProConnect

When Dating Him and You Know He’s Not for You

By . Posted on .

When Dating Him and You Know He’s Not for You
Men hear what they want to hear when dating , so make it very clear its not going to be romantic

When dating him and he’s pursuing you and you’re not interested, then you are the one holding all the cards. You always hear women talking about how they want the guy that is not available, so if you’re not into it just be upfront with him about it.

You have to be firm but kind and just say, “I’m flattered that you’re so interested in me, but I think I am looking for something different”. Men hear what they want to hear, so you need to make it very clear that you are not interested in a romantic relationship with him. Let him down gently; if he’s still a terrific guy then make sure he knows it and tell him you’ll keep him in mind for any of your single friends.

More from YourTango: What To Wear On Any Date

Once you’ve gotten it over with, shoot him an email offering to set him up with one of your friends. If you’ve handled the situation correctly, he may offer you the same. The point is, if he’s a nice person, try and keep the lines of communication open with him – because you never know, you may change your mind. I see couples all the time where it wasn’t love at first site, but got together somewhere down the road. Just remember, it never hurts to go out with a guy even if he’s not “the one”. You don’t know who is right for you until you meet him and give him a chance.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Matchmaker Janis Spindel

Author

Janis Spindel, President, CEO

Location: Bridgehampton, NY
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Matchmaker Janis Spindel:

What To Wear On Any Date

By

Gone are the days where a little black dress would fit the bill for any dating occasion. Before I got into the matchmaking industry 20 years ago, I worked in the world of fashion, so I can tell you with authority that it's a good idea to try and match the vibe of your date with the vibe of your outfit. Meanwhile, I've put together a basic list of five ... Read more

4 Sizzling Summer Sex Tips

By

​It's summertime: the drinks are colder, the nights are hotter, and it's the perfect time to bust out some new sex moves in the bedroom! You and your man deserve a night of romance, so pull out all the stops and try these fun tips! /node/156399 1. Add some food into the mix. ​It's easy to get hot and sweaty when things are heating up in the ... Read more

Love, Lust or Sex? 10 Tips in Understanding Your Relationship

By

Love and lust is a very difficult concept to differentiate from. While dating someone, it is easy to become completely infatuated with your significant other, but how do you know if it genuine or not? A few ways to tell if it is lust or love is to consider what you thoughts go through your mind once you see your significant other. Lust: Focusing on his ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
happiest

Honor: The Master Key For A Healthy Relationship

If you want to have a totally fulfilling relationship with your partner discover the art of honor.

Crazy

After breakup – do you keep the ring – or give it back?

NFL star, Mario Williams, and ex in ugly legal battle over $785k ring. What’s the right thing to do?

happiest

How To Keep Crush Interested In You

You finely got to talk and do much more with your crush.But Now what? How Can You Start Dating Him?

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS