Separating the B... from the S...


Separating the B... from the S...
Desperately racing to a yoga class so you can calm down? How to give yourself a reality check here.

And you, like me, like the rest of us, fall victim to the vortex, the “say one thing, do another” culture. The proverbial calm duck above water whose feet are furiously paddling to stay afloat. We are creatures addicted to the veneer, Bulls addicted to the sh#@*. Hurry up, rush, rush, rush, get mine now or it will be gone, that this is my last chance, there’s no more, if I don’t act now EVERYTHING will be gone, I won’t get my spot or my turn, if I don’t do whatever someone else will—covered up by fake smiles, deals you can’t afford to miss, false promises, fake orgasms, false pretenses, or worse; false intentions. We say we want to help, but what we don’t say is that we want to help ourselves. We say we want peace…yet we will trample the guy at Wal-Mart to get our 60% off, or free whatever, before the other guy gets it. My current fantasy (not sexy but hey) is wondering what it, life, us, would be like in the absence of fake?

As for the S, my guess is that being in survival mode according to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs (based on Physiological needs, then Safety, Belongingness and Love, Esteem, and finally Self-actualization or Transcendence) drives most of us and is responsible for what compels most of our unconscious, sh#@*y, fake behavior. Apparently what the last fifty years has taught us is that fake is the new real; when we have the rent paid then comes safety; if we have any energy left over from playing the game of satisfying our psychological needs and if we are among the eccentric few who make time, the last is self-actualization. Peak, or what I prefer to call spiritual experiences, are reserved for folks who apparently have time on their hands or just don’t get it the necessity for all the rest.



The bummer is that spirit is EXACTLY what we need right now. It’s our survival, old-brain, unconscious, dog-eat-dog, survival-of-the-fittest mentality that is killing us, or at least it’s trying to kill our spirit.

So how do we deal? Turn sh#@* into spirit? Take a deep, audible breath—ujjayi, kapalabhati, whatever—and for one precious moment, slow down. Look inside. (Oh, yeah, Great Relationships Begin Within, right?) Shift the focus.


I would rather spend my day in self-inquiry, any time, than be trampled by a rabid wanna-be yogini. Looks like that pyramid is doing a shirshasana—let’s flip it other-side-up. Who knows, maybe Maslow was dyslexic?

This article was originally published at Maryanne Live . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Maryanne Comaroto


Maryanne Comaroto


Radio Shows:  Maryanne Live

Next live show:

Maryanne Live! at 2pm PT June 3, on with Eric Maisel, author of Why Smart People Hurt: A Guide for the Bright, the Sensitive, and the Creative.

"Inner-Views on Love and Relationship"

Location: Greenbrae, CA
Credentials: CHT
Other Articles/News by Maryanne Comaroto:

Pro-Life? How About Pro-Dad?


First, this is a rant, not a blog. I hope you will indulge me anyway. There are few things I feel more passionate about, and I know I am not alone. Having been a single mom for over ten years, I know so many of you can, do and will relate. And I must warn you, it's rated R, so I apologize in advance for any offense that may occur. Here we ... Read more

Let's See How Far We've Come


I just have to share some of the things I learned in my philosophy class. Dr. Schreibman is a brilliant teacher, and you won't believe what I'm finding out!: In ancient western civilization (700-300 BCE) women were relegated to three primary roles: wife, slave or prostitute. During this period they were further regarded as men's legal wards. ... Read more

The Man Down the Street


I recently received the following questions. Many of us have felt these painful feelings and in my response I want to try to alleviate human suffering.  Dear Anonymous, Thank you for reaching out and then taking care to clarify things for me. My heart goes out to you during this difficult time and I will do my best to answer your questions here and ... Read more

See More

Latest Expert Videos
Must-see Videos
Most Popular