2. No matter what degrading names your abuser calls you, do not believe it. He is trying to humiliate you so he can control you further.
3. If you are a teen, tell your mom or someone you trust. It is better if you tell an adult. This is not something you can fight on your own.
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4. Make a plan with your mom, teacher or a best friend and make sure everyone knows what that plan is and where you will be. Make sure you can escape quickly. Have your things packed (if you have a child, pack their things as well) and store them in a safe place. Do not tell the abuser where you are going.
5. Do not look back. He will tell you that it is your fault, but remember that no one can cause another person to hurt you.
6. Recognize this person has led you to believe you are nothing without them. You actually will be so much better without him. The road to recovery is not easy, but there will be people to help you. Just don't go back!
7. Counseling is so important for your healing. It will be important to find out why you thought you ever deserved this sort of partner and to begin rebuilding your self-esteem.
It is important that parents talk to their teens about healthy relationships. Explain to them how to distinguish between a healthy relationship and an abusive one. Below are a few suggestions to begin the dialogue for parents:
1. Your child should know that when they are in a healthy relationship they should feel good about themselves. Their partner shouldn't lie or distort the truth and should build your child up. On the other hand, unhealthy relationships make you feel guilty, angry, scared or worried.
2. Healthy relationships involve give and take. There is a balance and it must feel equal. Unhealthy relationships may feel like you are giving the other person more attention than they are giving you.
3. Healthy relationships make you feel safe. You feel like you can completely be yourself. You don't have to try and be something you are not. You can trust this person with your secrets. If you cannot trust the person or this person makes fun of you about private and sensitive things, you may want to rethink if this person is someone you want to have a relationship with.
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