Self-absorbed people who don’t have a reality TV show are usually lonely. Their friends and family have tired from expending energy and time with their senseless drama. Whatever created their self-absorption in the beginning, whether it was being neglected as a child or spoiled as a child, eventually must be dealt with in order for them to become well and more focused on the needs of others. Below are suggestions for you if you feel as though you have become self- absorbed and need approval from strangers to validate yourself as a person:
• Learn to focus more on others. Self-absorbed people tell stories involving drama, so skills such as listening, asking questions, and refocusing yourself when you want to jump in with, "watch me, or look at me" stories.
• Be aware of what is going on around you. Self-absorption robs you from seeing outside yourself. Take notice of what community projects are going on, and volunteer at an agency that will help you get outside of your own needs.
• Practice empathy. When someone tells you they are hurting, instead of saying a time you hurt too, listen to them without judgment and try to imagine what it feels like to be them.
• Be supportive of others rather than exploiting them for your own needs.
• Practice gratitude with a gratitude journal.
We are a blessed country, but one of the problems that comes from being blessed is you begin to expect it. When you expect something you no longer are grateful, and a sense of entitlement may prevail. When a generation is no longer held accountable or made to work for what they receive, the sense of entitlement grows stronger. With entitlement comes self-absorption. Learning to get out of yourself and focusing on giving back to help others restores a sense of community, privacy, and respect.
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