Is a warm body better than no-body for New Year's Eve?

By

Is a  warm body better than no-body for New Year's Eve?
A hook up with someone you don't care for to avoid being alone, makes the New Year begin with dread


The loneliest most of us ever feel is when we are with someone we don’t care for. A bad date or a bad marriage can make us feel so alone and unloved. Many people go out with people they don’t like to avoid being alone for special holidays, and New Year’s Eve is one of those times. Who wants to be home alone on New Year’s Eve? It’s the one night you are supposed to go out, have romance and bring in the New Year with a kiss of passion and goodwill. I spent one New Year’s Eve with a guy I basically couldn’t stand. I don’t know why I accepted his proposal. He wasn’t even a good kisser and I had experienced his kisses enough to know that. It was miserable for me, and most likely, it wasn’t much fun for him either.
One of the reasons I didn’t want to be alone is because I didn’t understand how wonderful I could make that evening for myself. Many women and men date all sorts of people and go to terrible parties to avoid what I later learned can be a great evening. If you are going to be alone this New Year’s Eve begin now to make it special.
Tips on making your New Year’s Eve alone special:
1. Call an old friend who is too far away to be with. Spend some time talking on the phone, watching New Year's Eve specials together, and reminisce on the year gone by and discuss what's ahead. If your friend is going out at night, it’s okay to call her/him early in the day. Sometimes the voice brings back memories better than writing, so calling actually makes you feel closer and less alone.
2. Plan a nice meal for yourself (most of the time we plan dinner for two when we want to impress someone). How about impressing you? If you don’t cook, make plans at a special restaurant you have always wanted to try. Go early to avoid long lines. Take a book or something to read if you are worried about eating alone. Many times when you are alone, people are less intimidated and will be more likely to start up a conversation with you. Don’t forget that a really good glass of wine can be a nice way to enjoy your dinner. Splurge on yourself.
3. Before New Year’s Eve, invest in a new hobby to begin New Year’s Eve. Maybe a new book, or a lesson guide for playing the guitar, or learning a language. New Year’s Eve is a good time to think about an area you would like to develop more in the future. Finding a book about fitness or nutrition is a wonderful way to begin the New Year. When we exercise and eat better we have more confidence, and when we have more confidence we appreciate ourselves more.
4. Consider exploring new websites after dinner. Get online, look at funny U-Tubes or other sites you have been meaning to explore. Although it may be 10 p.m. in your time zone, it may be midnight somewhere else. Consider being the first to tell others “Happy New Year.” Get online.
5. If you cannot stand to be alone, consider hosting a party for everyone you know who is single. When you have others around who have a lifestyle you share, it is much easier to feel connected. Good friends are always a better option than being with someone who bores you or doesn’t respect you. Just remember, if they drink (and most of our friends do), they may need to spend the night. Friends don’t let friends drive intoxicated. Period!
6. Take a hot bath with good smelling bubbles. Enjoy soft lighting, a glass of champagne and good music. You don’t need to be with someone else to relax and feel good about your own body. While relaxing in the water remind yourself how fortunate you have been and be thankful. Begin to imagine your new year. Thank your body for all it has done for you this year.
7. If being alone this year for New Year’s Eve is too scary, try a getaway. Plan a vacation. Go somewhere you have always wanted to go and explore it fully. Getting away distracts you from not having someone to share the evening with. It also is a good way to learn more about yourself and others!
The best relationships always begin with the relationship we have with ourselves. New Year’s Eve is the perfect evening to begin exploring and celebrating ourselves. You don’t need another person to symbolize you are okay or desirable. In fact, the most desirable people I know are the ones who know how to celebrate themselves from time to time. You will be one of the few who wakes up January 1, 2012 feeling invigorated and inspired; grateful you didn’t settle under pressure on New Years Eve. - Mary Jo Rapini


For more information and MONTHLY FREE RELATIONSHIP TIP go to: www.maryjorapini.com
Talk to me on my fan page: http://www.facebook.com/maryjorapini
Tweet me: @ Mary Jo Rapini
Get your “MOJO MOMENT” each day on Fox 26 at 9a.m.CST.
http://houston.cbslocal.com/2011/07/06/dos-and-donts-after-the-breakup/
http://houston.cbslocal.com/2011/07/13/how-to-cope-after-infidelity/?utm...
http://khmx.radio.com/shows/mary-jo-rapini/
Join me every Thursday Morning on “Mind, Body, Soul with Mary Jo” on Fox 26 Houston at 9 a.m.

 

More Juicy Content From YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Mary Jo Rapini

Counselor/Therapist

For more information go to: www.maryjorapini.com
Talk to me on my fan page: http://www.facebook.com/maryjorapini
Tweet me: @MaryJoRapini
Read my Love and Relationships Blog on Chron.com
Ask me questions on Fox26 in Houston, TX and watch every Thursday Morning at 9am for “Mind, Body, Soul with Mary Jo” and Friday Morning's at 8am for “Healthy Happy Hour with Mary Jo”

Location: Houston, TX
Credentials: LPC
Other Articles/News by Mary Jo Rapini:

Sleeping In The Nude: Does What You Wear To Bed Affect Intimacy?

By

A recent survey published by Cotton USA reveals that 57 percent of married couples who sleep nude report being happy with their partner. Roughly half of all couples do sleep nude and approximately half of those are over the age of 55. Is it the nudity itself helping couples feel happier with their partner or is the nudity symbolic for something deeper that ... Read more

5 Ways To Survive A Friend Unfriending You

By

A group of my colleagues and friends were talking about losing good friends. One of my friends' situations was a job promotion and a change of location. Her friend cut her off, didn't want to be her friend anymore, and un-friended her on Facebook, leaving her feeling confused and mistrusting. Had this person been a friend at all? Another friend told ... Read more

Fighting Fair Made Easy In Six Easy Steps

By

http://youtu.be/-_G4NpWgyNQ   The one area that most couples do not explore before they get married is "how to fight". It may seem derogatory, or somehow cynical to focus on how you will fight with each other when you are beginning a new life together, but nothing could be further from the truth. Learning to fight fair has health benefits as ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB