The Super Bowl is February 6; 2011.It doesn’t matter if you are rooting for the Steelers or the Packers, or if you care who wins. When you live with a Football fanatic, this day is sacred. They live for it, plan a menu around it, buy new TV’s for it, or purchase plane tickets and outfits to be part of the action. A recent survey by WET, who manufactures intimacy products, came up with several interesting results regarding the big game:
• Almost four in ten respondents (38%) indicated that they have better sex when their (or their partner’s) favorite sports team wins a big game.
• Approximately 9% of respondents (or their partners) have withheld sex because their favorite sports team lost an important game.
• Almost two thirds of respondents (65%) would rather have one night of mind-blowing sex than win a trip to the Super Bowl.
These responses indicate that sex may be correlated with the Super Bowl and, because of this; it is an opportunity to improve and make your marriage better while enjoying the hoopla of the Super Bowl. In a wonderful book, “The Science of a Good Marriage,” Tara Parker-Pope sites a study that is important for married or soon to be married couples. At the University of Washington, researchers reviewed data and a pattern emerged. In stable, close marriages there are five times more positive interactions than negative ones. When the ratio drops, the marriage began to disintegrate and the risk for divorce became higher.
Most of us don’t and shouldn’t keep an ongoing tally with positives to negatives in our marriage. However, a simple “I am sorry” is not good enough according to this research. For each negative you have said or committed, you have to ramp up and make sure you say and do five positives. Good marriage math (a 5 to 1 ratio) can make your marriage strong so it will survive those difficult days that every marriage has.
The Super Bowl is the perfect time to stock up and save those positive numbers for your marriage. I have a list of positives that I think would be wonderful, and I am sure you will think up many more.
1. Wives, if the game is at your home and your hubby is “into football,” encourage him to have his buddies over (even the annoying ones) and make sure you have food and good drinks. Be generous…do it for him.
2. Husbands, as you watch and see a beautiful woman on the TV, in front of your buddies turn to your wife and say, “MY WIFE IS MORE BEAUTIFUL.”
3. Wives, when your husband’s team is losing, rub his neck and tell him they still may catch up.
4. Wives, if your hubby’s team is really losing, don’t lie. Whisper in his ear, “The game is not as important as what happens when all of our friends go home.”
5. Husbands supervise your buddies and make sure there is a garbage can where they know to throw all of their garbage. If you have to pick up after the friends leave, she will get tired and go to bed.
This plan is so simple, but it works. Beginning the day before the Super Bowl, get it into your head that you need to say and do five positives for every negative. Your spouse shouldn’t keep track, but you should. Have a high scoring Super Bowl Sunday and an even better marriage for the rest of your lives. –Mary Jo Rapini
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