Once you are able to ascertain the answers to these questions, you can go to him, and tell him you have reflected on some of your feelings lately and have a better understanding of what is going on in the marriage. You can tell him that you have a part also. This will minimize feelings of defensiveness and anger. When you both are able to see your part in this problem, you can begin making changes. How To Fall 'In Like' With Your Spouse
Some people flirt because it is a learning style they learned from their family of origin and they achieve success by using this tactic. In a marriage however, when you suddenly notice flirting, it is a warning sign. See the red flag and before you attack, take a look at your own part in the relationship. It is always easier to project blame onto a partner; however, the marriages with the most contentment are the ones that identify their part in the relationship and work to change the dynamics if it is causing their partner distress. Good luck to you, Diane. I am so glad you value your marriage enough to reach out to me. My readers may be able to offer additional insights with their comments. –Mary Jo Rapini
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