2. Limit how much you allow yourself to think about it. Plan a time of day and a specific amount of time (15 minutes) you will allow yourself to obsess. When the thought comes to you and it isn’t that time of day, tell yourself it is not time and you will reserve that thought for the time permitted.
3. Get involved with good friends. Friends can help you eliminate fiction from fact. If you are sure he is out with someone else and there is no evidence, your friends can assure you that you shouldn’t think like this until you have clear evidence.
4. Distraction. Whenever you begin to obsess, transplant a different thought or action into your schedule. For example, whenever you begin to obsess, tell yourself you will do 20 crunches or push-ups. Soon you will either find yourself finding reasons not to think about him, or you will be working toward a buff chest and tight tummy, which will help boost body confidence.
5. Shut off all ways to communicate. This works because if you are worried he won’t call and you make yourself unavailable, this helps preserve the ego. You can tell yourself maybe he called or maybe he didn’t, but you were unavailable. It gives the control back to you.
Anyone who has ever obsessed about anyone’s affection knows how terribly out of control it feels. It may fuel the affection, but it distracts you from being who you want to be. The question isn’t will he like you or not, the question is, do you like yourself enough to acknowledge the obsessive thoughts, but not let them control your life? –Mary Jo Rapini
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