A recent survey from a business school in Cambridge, England analyzed a yearlong survey of over seven thousand households and asked them how many times they had sex per week, whether they were employed and how much money they made. The survey reflected that those who made more money had more sex. This doesn’t prove that making more money leads to more sex, but it is correlated. The study didn’t control for all variables. However, it was a good random size and did reflect some important points.
Upon looking at the study several factors become clear. People who have frequent sex do tend to be healthier and happier. They also have improved self-esteem because they feel loved and connected. They also noted clearer thinking skills most likely due to their decrease in depression. Depression is known to cause confusion, inability to focus and a decreased libido.
What the study didn’t discuss is something I find fascinating. When women make more money they tend to have sex less. When men make more money they tend to have sex more. Professional women who make a lot of money will frequently tell their friends that guys don’t want to date or marry them. Women’s financial power does not translate into more sexual partners, whereas for men, the opposite is true.
Men who make a lot of money are valued by women because of the following three areas that money represents to women:
1. A secured future.
2. They have a good job and are usually educated.
3. A certain amount of status comes with a man who is wealthy.
Women who make a lot of money are basically shunned by guys due to these three areas that money represents to men:
1. Guys may feel less of or devalued as a man if their woman is making more or has a more professional job than he does.
2. Guys have a strong need to feel needed, and many achieve it with their financial abilities. If their wife makes more, they may struggle.
3. Guys have more of a sense of winning or competing, which overflows into salary. They need to know they are taking care of their family and being a man.
Working with couples I have come to understand that both genders want the same thing in a partner. Money can influence other qualities, but at the end of the day what is important is that your partner shows sincerity, responsibility, affection, intelligence and honesty. Intimacy and sexuality are both healthy, but the couple determines the frequency, and not by the amount of money they make. There is nothing wrong with having sex once a week if that’s what works well for you, any more than there is anything right or wrong about having sex seven times a week if that works. This study has flaws and perhaps one of its most poignant ones is the fact that it doesn’t mention people who are billionaires so consumed with their money that they aren’t having sex at all. Sex like money is powerful, and in a relationship how much you would like to have sex has little to do with how much you have it. –Mary Jo Rapini