Bad sex isn't contagious but it can infect your marriage
By Mary Jo Rapini. Posted on .
2. Guys have to approach sex as a way of expressing their love. Men frequently say that semantics isn’t as important to them as it is to women. This may be true. However, if you are married to a woman, you better be able to express your sexual self with words of endearment that can help turn her on.
3. A big question men ask that only a woman can answer is: “If you like the orgasm and we have fun with sex, why don’t you want to have sex more often?” The answer is: The orgasm was good, great perhaps; however, women need more to push them over the edge and make them want a man again and again. This push happens the minute her man gets up in the morning: what he says and does, and it lasts until bedtime. This has nothing to do with what’s fair; it has to do with the truth.
4. Ladies need to know their body and what feels good. No man can discern this no matter how many women he has had unless you guide him. Every woman is wired differently and it has much to do with the mind and spine, such as where the nerves connect. Women who don’t touch their bodies or don’t know what feels good to them, miss out when it comes to good sex. If you fake an orgasm, you are going to have to fake it the rest of your life, because he is going to touch you in the SAME place each time you have sex.
5. Married sex can get boring and monotonous. As a couple you need to have better hygiene than you would if it were a one night stand, and you need to spice it up more than you would if you were simply dating. This is your life partner…treat them with the best of you.
Sex can infect a marriage, but only lack of intimacy can kill it. Bad sex happens, sometimes during prolonged illness, arguments, and other challenges we all face in our marriage. If you can touch, talk, and listen, there is nothing you cannot work through with the right support (except abuse). Bad sex happens, but it doesn’t happen forever unless you stop the intimacy. Changing a bad sex partner for a good sex partner is an option many people choose in real life, but being a therapist has usually proven to me that you cannot wipe out bad sex by changing partners. After all, if you are in a sexual relationship with someone you care about, you need to know how to use your words and actions for good sex. –Mary Jo Rapini
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