- Talk about it with your partner. Sometimes one partner wants it and the other doesn't. While we often think it's usually the man who doesn't want to get married, Fisher notes, "Despite the myth that men are less committed, they are predisposed to desire marriage. It's evolution. He wants to keep the mother of his children around to ensure his DNA lives on." 3 Steps to Your Ideal Relationship
- Talk about your finances. It's very important to keep open communication between partners about finances. In America, 45% of 25 to 34 year olds are married. In 2000, 55% of Americans in that age group were married. In the 1960s, more than 80% were. Increasingly, many are waiting to get married until it makes sense financially.
- Plan to marry for the right reason. Love or tax benefits? Just know why you're getting married! 5 Necessary Qualities For A Happy Marriage
- Consider creating an alternative ritual of commitment. Domestic partnerships are a path many couples are taking. A marriage alternative can look like a legal union in every way, or it might simply be a verbal agreement. Domestic partnerships are available to both same-sex and different-sex couples and allow for legal rights similar to those of a married couple (property ownership, support obligations etc).
- Consider possible legal reasons for tying the knot. Health insurance is certainly a benefit when one spouse has it and the other needs it. With children, you also gain tax benefits when you get married. In addition, there can be intangible benefits for your kids: a committed relationship between two parental figures. This of course can also happen without marriage, but sometimes it feels more real for kids if their parents have tied the knot. Texting Your Way To Love [VIDEO]
So should you get married before you have kids? It really depends. If you are ready, go for it! And if not, take your time. Pamela Haag, Ph.D, author of Marriage Confidential, says, "Marriage might still be the preferred dream. But it's not the exclusive dream."
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