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4. Divorced couples hold onto the anger and resentments
I see this time and time again with my clients. They would prefer to be right versus let go of the anger and resentment that will not only hurt them, but will add fuel to the fire of the volatile environment that they have (consciously or unconsciously) decided to create for themselves and their children. I have seen ex-couples spend 100,000s in court fees, not only costing them financially but also emotionally. I have also see parents not allow the other parent not see their child (for no real VALID reason).
More from YourTango: For a Great Marriage Stop Needing To Be Right!
Instead, would it not make more sense to let the attrition go? To make peace with what has been done. The event has happened, the past is the past, why not start with forgiveness of the other, but more importantly – forgiveness of self.
5. Don’t seek help
I often see divorced couples going through the motions of getting through the tough times, but do not take the pro-active stance of seeking help. Instead they may confide in their children, which is not fair either. The responsibility of the parent is to look after them first and then their children.
Instead ask for help, seek council if it is getting all too much. You don’t have to do it on your own and there are all sorts of resources out there to aid you in healing the wounds.
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In short, its important for divorced parents to make sure that they look after themselves first by letting go of the anger and blame (however hard) so that they can do their very best to be their for their children.
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If you wish to connect with me to read my blogs and download your free ebook The 7.5 Mistakes That Women Make To Stop Them Moving On From Their Ex please do so at www.DivorceShift.com.