3. Express these needs when they arise - not when you've gotten to the frustrated, angry or withdrawn level. If you develop the awareness of your needs and fears, then begin working on expressing them when they arise. This will help you and your partner meet each others' needs before frustration and anger develop. This will minimize the tendency to build a barrier to communication and connection when in a negative cycle.
4. Make sure to take time to nurture your relationship. Just like a garden that needs watering and tending, a relationship needs to also have that level of care to flourish and grow. Don't put your relationship last, especially parents, because this will only lead to less connection and companionship. Take the time to plan dates where you can enjoy each others' company, do an activity that you love, or just be together without distraction.
Building lasting, connecting, loving relationships is what all humans want and deserve. Making sure you know your needs and fears and expressing them to your partner in a safe, caring way, will go a long way to making a strong bond and connection. If you are struggling in making this happen, get some professional guidance from a couple therapist - it's worth the time to make your partnership solid!