How To Handle Infidelity


Erasing Heart
If you don't take the time to heal from the wounds of infidelity, you could feel the pain forever.

Deal with Infidelity

Infidelity is a powerful and terrible tragedy to go through. No one deserves to be cheated on. That gives you the right to deal with infidelity, and it gives you the right to deal with it any way that you feel that you need to.


  • If it makes you feel better to scream, stamp your feet on the floor and cuss – DO IT.
  • If you want to cry and scream into a pillow for hours – DO IT.
  • If you want to cuss at your husband or boyfriend for 30 straight minutes – DO IT.
  • If you want to just go be alone in your car – DO IT.
  • If you want to just cry in the closet with the lights off and pretend you are in a cave that you never have to come out of – DO IT.
  • Whatever you have to do when you have to do it to feel better – DO IT.

I can't stand the expression to get over it. It's insulting. It's as if it's some frivalous thing that you are overreacting to. You aren't crying over spilled milk, you are crying over the love of your life falling in love with someone else. This is important here — let's grieve. It's not going to take a minute here, it's not even going to take days, or even months. I'm talking a year, two years … and maybe even more.Should You Win Him Back Or Let Him Go?

A Little Infidelity Exercise for You

So everyone who has been betrayed — you stand up right now and say, "I will NOT get over infidelity. I will feel this pain. I will get in touch with this pain. I want to heal from this pain so that I can live my life happy someday."

You are going to recover from infidelity. You have to let yourself recover from it though. "Getting over it" doesn't allow you to do that. So, go scream, or cry … do whatever you want to do … just take care of yourself. You deserve that much. 

If you need further help getting through the process, for example, you just feel stuck in the rage, sadness and lonliness, and you want someone who knows what it is like to help you through it, come by Relationship Repair for some help. You can read my blog, learn more about me and my relationship coaching services. Don't feel as though no one understands — I do.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
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