Gay love will come when you relax and simply allow it.
I know that you really want a relationship, and you feel like you're spinning your wheels trying to find gay love. You're constantly putting yourself out there, meeting new boys online and in person, going on dates, following up, and generally doing everything you're "supposed" to be doing to find love. But for some reason the connection is just not happening; you're just not feeling it with anyone.
In fact, the harder you try, the further away a relationship seems. You're getting frustrated and maybe even panicking a bit and thinking, "Is there anyone out there for me?" "Am I going to be stuck at home alone watching reruns of RuPaul's Drag Race with my cat every Saturday night from here to the end of eternity?" Tragic.
Don't panic, and dial down the frustration. Chances are you've heard this saying before: "You'll find love the moment you stop looking for it." For those of us who believe that dating is a numbers game (the more boys you meet and date, the closer you are to finding a relationship), this seems quite contradictory. But it's true!
So often we feel that we need to "get" the things we want. Someone else is in possession of the thing we want, and we must convince them that we are worthy of receiving this thing from them. So we work hard to prove our worthiness, and hope and pray that they eventually agree and hand it over.
We do this with our jobs—convincing the manager that we are more worthy of the position than the other candidate. We do this with our sex—convincing the boy across from us that we are the hottest guy in the bar and that he should give his body to us. We do this with our friends and family—convincing them that they should give us their attention and loyalty. And we do this with our intimate relationships—spending time and effort convincing someone that we are worthy of their love.
But you don't need to convince anyone that you are worthy of their love. Because you already are! You are a unique person that brings an energy into this world that is different from anyone else. When you relax into your own being, you no longer need to work hard to "get" a relationship.
You simply be who you are and realize that you are already a whole, perfect and complete person with or without a boyfriend. So, stop looking for the relationship because you don't need it. Your capacity to hold strength and love increases tremendously as you learn to nurture your self. And ironically, this is precisely when you have the ability to accept another person into your life. And it comes to you.
So, chill out, and don't work so hard. The truth is that you don't go out and "get" a relationship; you attract a relationship and it comes to you. Your job is to know, understand, and feel your own worth. Then relax and allow the Law of Attraction to bring the love to you.
This article was originally published at Gay Love Project. Reprinted with permission.
5. It's fine to risk your friends' lives for a boyfriend.
Hey, remember when Ariel almost got her lifelong friend and occasional guardian Sebastian killed so she could dine with a guy who'd never even heard her talk? You do? You need to know that that's never okay.
7. It's acceptable to show up to parties uninvited.
There won't always be enough tea to go around if you keep showing up to parties you're not even invited to attend. And, like Alice, you may find yourself surrounded by lunatics with no respect for themselves, each other or anyone else's property.
When she was a kid, Tiana swore she'd never kiss a frog. She changed her mind. Sure, it worked out in the end, but only after she was transformed into an amphibian and subject to a number of voodoo curses.
13. Having short, dark hair is like, the worst thing ever.
Brunettes are people too. And listen, unless you have a genetic or Ariana Grande-edges issue, your hair will grow back. That's what hair does. If you don't think this is true, remember how you felt the last time you forgot to shave your legs.
Snow White was in a coffin with her eyes closed in a "sleep-like death," and the seven dwarves just let this happen. Like, Doc didn't even side-eye Prince Charming making out with what everyone thought was just a really well-preserved corpse. Why weren't her pals called the Seven Deviants?
You know why Snow White was always happy and encouraged you to "whistle while you work?" Because she wasn't actually working. She got woodland creatures to do all that crap for her. Then, like lots of people in upper management, she took credit for everything once it was done.
16. Your dad will always bail you out of dangerous situations.
Ariel could always rely on her father, King Triton, to save her in The Little Mermaid. For most of us, though, eventually our dads get tired of our s*it and make us grow up, whether or not that means growing legs.
Flynn Rider may be charming in Tangled, but he's a thief with a false identity and was in what's basically a gang with two sociopaths called The Stabbington Brothers. If you wouldn't allow yourself to get sexed into a gang, why would you encourage this Catfish coupling?
Wendy Darling was commissioned by Peter Pan and the Lost Boys to be their mother in Neverland. Then she tried to make out with Peter Pan, who, as you can tell, is just not that into her. Because Peter Pan isn't a creep, no matter how many associations he may have with the late Michael Jackson.