7. He has become a better parent since your divorce. If your ex has stepped up his parenting game since your divorce, chances are you've thought, "If only he'd been like this while we were married." Well, he wasn't: It probably took the dramatic shift in your relationship dynamic to bring this about. As frustrating as this may be, his active involvement now is good for your kids.
8. Not everything about your marriage was bad. After a divorce, it's easy to remember the bad times, fights, disagreements, and ugliness, but in reality there must have been some good times too. There were times when you made each other laugh and times when you had fun outings as a family.
My ex is an avid skier—dare I say, obsessed? We were a ski family. I became a much better skier because of him, and our kids have skied almost since they were toddlers. I see skiing as one of his gifts to us all. This past winter, my daughter joined her college ski racing team and experienced the unique camaraderie of being on a college sports team. And even now, some 20 years and a divorce later, I'm still connected with some of my early skiing friends.
9. You were right for each other once. Even though you're no longer a couple, you chose to be together for a reason. Your relationship is part of your journey through life, and it's part of your growth, even if you have grown apart. He is a part of who you are today.
In helping your children honor their father on his day, you're also teaching them an important and valuable life skill about showing appreciation for others. It's a skill that will serve them well as they make their way through school, college, and the workplace. And if none of that motivates you to help your children honor their father this Father's Day, consider this: Mother's Day is only 330 days away!
Divorce coach Mandy Walker is the founder of the divorce support blog Since My Divorce. Contact Mandy for a free 30-minute "New Beginnings" consultation to find out if divorce coaching is right for you. You can also download Mandy's Visioning Your Life After Divorce workbook.