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Is 2013 Your Year To Find Love?

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Is 2013 Your Year To Find Love?
A 10 week plan to find love, romance, and a real partner this year!

7. Sort and be willing to say “Next!” I see people who make it all the way through the first 6 steps and get stuck here. They don’t want to say “No thank you” or “This is not a fit for me.” People get stuck in a pattern of “not enough.” This shows up as there are not enough people in the world, what if this was my only chance, I should give him another chance, I’m not good enough for him/her, or my favorite, I’ll stay with him because I see his potential! Your responsibility at this stage is to sort through what will not work to find what will work. Make it easier on yourself by being willing to say “Next!”

8. Be honest. This might sound like I’m being condescending, but I am not. As a relationship coach, I’ve seen many wonderful people twisting themselves into pretzels trying to be what they think someone else wants. What you want is reasonable, and you have every right to ask for what you want. Yes, there might be compromises down the road, but at least start off saying who you are and what you want.

More from YourTango: When Love Goes Wrong – Really Wrong (The Jodi Arias Case)

9. Teach others how to treat you. This goes hand in hand with number 8. You must speak your needs out loud. If someone disrespects you or demeans you, either say "Next!" or teach them from the very beginning how to meet your needs. Do not pretend to be something you are not.

10. The final and most potent step towards finding love is to give love to yourself and others. When you are living in a state of love, you attract love. Live every moment as though you might meet your mate and fall in love - any minute now! Look people in the eyes, notice them, smile, talk, flirt, laugh, giggle, and have fun with this.

More from YourTango: How Independence Creates More Intimacy

Happy and positive people are more attractive. It’s true. The happier you are with yourself as a single person, the better your chances for romance. Take the time you need to get into shape. Like a marathon, you need to work slowly and build your muscles. To find love, make the decision to prepare and get ready for it by taking real action. And in the meantime, go out and do things you love to do. More than ever, take the time to meet new people and basically, have fun, laugh, and play. Before you know it, your mate will appear.
 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Lori Rubenstein

Author

Lori S. Rubenstein, JD, CPC is a family law attorney-mediator turned relationship coach turned Forgiveness Teacher. Her passion is to help you discover and remove the roadblocks that get in the way of joy and finding your way back to love. You can get back on that path with Lori’s books, Forgiveness: Heal Your Past and Find the Peace You Deserve, Transcending Divorce: A Guide to Personal Growth and Transformation, Freedom from Abuse: Finding Yourself Again, and with her 10-CD/audio and workbook, The I am Petrified to Date Again Dating Package.

You can watch and hear Lori talk about Forgiving the Unforgivable here.  

To talk personally to Lori about your situation, you may reach her at lorirubenstein@gmail.com. If you would like to be informed about upcoming workshops, teleclasses and retreats in Lori’s monthly newsletter, text the word forgive to 22828. 

For daily discussions with Lori, come join her here on Facebook.

Location: Clarkdale, AZ
Credentials: CPC, JD
Specialties: Divorce/Divorce Prevention
Other Articles/News by Lori Rubenstein:

When Love Goes Wrong – Really Wrong (The Jodi Arias Case)

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How Independence Creates More Intimacy

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I want to start out with a premise: You can not have a healthy, intimate relationship without healthy boundaries. You know those couples that swoon over each other and you look at them and wonder if it is real? What you are seeing may be total enmeshment. Remember, everyone has a “public face,” but what really happens behind closed ... Read more

Are You Like Kim Kardashian When it Comes to Love?

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Kim Kardashian’s in the spotlight again after her nightmare divorce from Kris Humphries was finally granted 536 days after the filing of the divorce, seven times longer than their marriage. Somehow this is front page news. People say the Kardashian’s are famous for being famous. True. Famous for being beautiful. True. And what people don’t ... Read more

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