Do you feel comfortable in your skin? Do you feel sexy and sassy? Do you feel like you swallowed a 1,000 watt light bulb and it’s shining out your eyes and skin?
If these aren’t your default settings most of the time, let’s start with the signs that you may be leaking your power. Which of these sound familiar?
- You don’t feel satisfied, successful, or beautiful, despite evidence to the contrary.
- You worry if your partner finds you attractive anymore.
- Exhaustion and overwhelm are your go-to emotional states.
- You aren’t fully aware of what rejuvenates you, or don’t feel like you deserve it yet.
- Doing the things you are “supposed” to do, expected to do or “should” do is infinitely easier than doing something for you.
- You feel if you were to express what you need, that would mean you are being needy (and no one wants to be needy, right?)
- If I were to ask you, “what brings you pleasure and joy?” you’d tell me you don’t have time.
- You believe you’ll get to enjoy things once you’ve worked hard enough and have earned them.
- You don’t know how to be “feminine,” or what that really means.
- Flow, what flow? Zone, what zone?
Let me introduce you to what I call the Pleasure Thermometer. This turns things around most dramatically for the women I work with, either through private coaching or my signature self-study course, Get S.A.S.S.Y.
Instead of measuring your body temperature, your Pleasure Thermometer measures how much pleasure you are experiencing in your daily life.
When you are full of what brings you pleasure, you glow. When you are full of what brings you pleasure (and enjoyment … same thing) you’re naturally comfortable in your skin and in touch with your authentic sensuality. When you are full of pleasure, you are full like a well, with plenty to go around.
Conversely, when you are ignoring your pleasure – when the number on your Pleasure Thermometer drops dramatically – you are running on empty, subsisting on fumes. You become like a black hole or an “emotional vampire,” sucking all the light and energy out of a room or the people in it.
Turns out that what men find most attractive in women isn’t big boobs or a thin, toned body. Those things are a nice bonus, but what really magnetizes you to him is when you are comfortable in her skin and with her sensuality.
Turns out that what has people say, “I’ll have what she’s having,” ala the diner scene in the movie, When Harry Met Sally, is your authentic glow.
Guess where your authentic femininity, a feeling of being in the “flow” of things, a natural fount of energy and focus and a grasp of your own beauty and value comes from? Being on intimate terms with your pleasure.
So what does your pleasure has to do with your power?