Is Your Partner Emotionally Abusive?


Is Your Partner Emotionally Abusive?

As wonderful as a loving and secure relationship can be, an emotionally abusive relationship can be pure hell for the victim. Sometimes it can be tricky to know if you're in this type of unhealthy dynamic as an aspect of it often involves "crazymaking" behavior, where the controlling partner manipulates the situation to knock the other off balance psychologically. You might even wonder if you're going crazy!

If you feel like you "walk on eggshells" around your partner to avoid blow-ups or as though your self-esteem has diminished over the course of the relationship, these are both red flags.

More from YourTango: Your Thanksgiving Day Survival Guide: 4 Ways To Beat The Stress

Here are five more signs you may be in an emotionally abusive relationship:

1) Your partner frequently criticizes or humiliates you.

2) Your partner isolates you from your family and friends.

3) Your partner limits or controls your access to money.

4) You feel trapped in your relationship.

5) You're afraid of your partner.

The “cycle of abuse" usually involves a kind of repetitive looping consisting of four phases:

1) Tension Building: The receiver gets the sense that the abuser is upset and takes active steps to placate him/her.

2) Incident: Verbal or emotional abuse occurs – consisting of threats, humiliation, blaming, intimidation, etc.

3) Reconciliation: Abuser apologizes, minimizes the abuse, blames the receiver, denies it occurred, etc.

4) Calm: No abuse taking place, often called the “honeymoon phase.”

This cycle has the effect of eventually breaking the person down emotionally. It can happen quickly for some – and take years for others.

More from YourTango: Life Balance Is A Moving Target

If you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship, make sure to take steps to protect yourself. Have a safety plan intact and increase your support network. If you suspect your partner has the capability to become physically violent and you fear for your safety call 911.

For help and advice on escaping an abusive relationship, call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Recent Expert Posts

She's That Into You: Cracking the Code of Women

Women give off signals telling you how they feel.


6 Texting Shockers You Must Avoid!

Sending your man a text message sounds easy enough, but get it wrong and it could be the end of you.


The addiction to "busy"ness: How to live with more intention

Is the daily routine of life getting you down? Find your passion and live a more authentic life!

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>