Expert Blog Compelling advice, stories, and thought-provoking perspectives straight from YourTango's lineup of Experts to you

4 Sexy Ways To Spice Up A Dull, Booooring Sex Life

Photo: weheartit
Ways to Spice Up Bedroom Activity
Contributor
Sex

Don't let it get stale.

In any relationship today, one of the most challenging parts of the process is keeping the spark alive. It can come in peaks and troughs, but it can also fade out entirely if you don’t at least try and innovate.

If you are in a rut in your relationship and feel like you are both gradually becoming ‘best friends’ rather than a couple with an energetic and exciting sex life, here are some tips on how to have better sex that can make a difference.

1. Play a game.


Weheartit

It can make ones’ toes curl up with embarrassment as you try and broach the subject, so you might have to step out of your comfort zone a little bit. Talk about what you are both "into" and what makes you both tick.

Find out, if possible, what kind of scenarios exist that would really make your partner purr. We all have one so don’t let them get out of it — everyone has a naughty side, they just might not like unlocking it. Find out what your partner thinks would be the scenario that turns them on most, and try to re-create it!

2. Smoke it up.

While many people believe that cannabis is counter-effective when it comes to having fun in the bedroom, it’s actually a great choice. It heightens sensitivity A LOT so you can both enjoy a more… exciting time in bed together. This gives you an easy way to appreciate and enjoy your time in bed together.

Also, it creates a much more relaxed atmosphere for you both without the same stupidity and bravado that being drunk creates. If you find that you both are too stuck in a particular way of thinking or working, this is definitely something you should consider trying. Of course, only do so if it’s legal where you live!

3. Spice it up.


Tumblr

Most people don't realize it but they are attracted to "extras". Things like toys, saucy lingerie and the like can be the perfect way to add a bit of panache back into the bedroom.

Turn around your sex life by surprising your partner. While it’s harder for men to do this on the hop, you can get your partner a fun and attractive gift that they can make the most of… for both of you. Spicing it up with some extra assistants can be a fun way to take your relationship — and your climaxes — to levels they never previously reached.

4. Get flexible.

We aren’t talking about positions here — well, not explicitly. Some couples get into a routine where they mark a time for making it work in the bedroom. For example, Saturday nights. It’s stupid to do this and goes a long way to making your relationship more or less unworkable.

Being spontaneous and taking it when the moment seems to flare up (in private, of course; doing it in the middle of a store might not appeal to all) is far more effective. Being flexible with when the magic happens makes it feel a bit more magic once again.

Using the above, you might just find that the fireworks will return! 

Author
Contributor

Expert advice

Save your breath because you only need two words to make him commit.
Are you REALLY thinking about their happiness?
If you keep finding yourself in heartbreaking, dead end relationships, listen up.
It seems like you can't do anything right.
Contributor

Explore YourTango