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How ADHD Affects Your Long-Term Dating Life

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How ADHD Affects Your Long-Term Dating Life
ADHD can make good men seem boring.
Relationships are already hard but adding ADHD to the mix throws in an extra curve ball.

It seems the more I listen to people in and out of my therapy practice, the more I realize that for many of us, achieving a healthy love relationship is often fraught with much difficulty.

Obviously, there are multitudes of reasons why people may have difficulty forming healthy long term relationships and I should certainly know, having had my share of "roller-coaster rides" but having ADHD often adds to the difficulty in very distinct ways. This article explores some of those difficulties as they apply to love, romance and ADHD.

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Recently I had a conversation with a client who has a long history of unsuccessful romantic relationships. She's a beautiful young woman who has had a variety of passionate relationships which, for some reason never "work out." Over our past few sessions we have explored this pattern, only to discover the men she most cared for were exciting, handsome and dreamy but somehow not very supportive or emotionally available.

On the other hand, she had a variety of long term relationships with men who she referred to as her closest friends. She told me these men have been there for her for many years and were all extremely supportive and solid in her life. In fact, her best friend, is a man she has known for the past 10 years. This man has provided her with a rich friendship that includes trust, shared values, affection, loyalty and great fun. When I asked her why she had never dated him, she said that he was not her type. "So, what exactly is your type?" I asked. 

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(Continue Reading Love, Romance and ADHD)

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Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Leslie Rouder

Author

Leslie Rouder, LCSW, Cht. 

http://www.Leslierouder.com

www.ADDadults.net 

For further articles pertaining to women and women's issues please go to http://www.leslierouder.com

For further articles on ADD or to sign up for my free ADD Newsletter. go to http://www.ADDadults.net

 

Location: Boca Raton, FL
Credentials: CHT, LCSW
Specialties: Anxiety Issues, Empowering Women, Holistic Coach
Other Articles/News by Leslie Rouder:

The Great Slut-Shaming Hoax: Ladies, Don't Buy It!

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Gloria Steinem once said that "any woman who chooses to behave like a full human being should be warned that the armies of the status quo will treat her as something of a dirty joke." I realize how true this statement is as I consider a recent blog posting that was placed on the Internet by the ex boyfriend of a good friend of mine. He referred to ... Read more

Why Answering This One Question Changed My Life

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What do words mean to you? To your relationship? And how long do you remember what your partner tells/asks you? Author Leslie Rouder talks about the profound question a therapist asked her thirty years ago and why it still matters today. The lesson learned? Words matter.  Back in the 1980s, while living in New York City, I saw a therapist named ... Read more

Help! My ADHD Partner Never Hears Me

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The great Carl Jung once said that "Loneliness doesn't come from having no one around you, but from being unable to communicate the things that are important to you." Although this is a universal truth, in the case of those who have ADHD, communication can certainly be a bigger obstacle to intimacy than to those who do not. Not only for the person ... Read more

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