4. There is also retaliation. You don't get mad, you get even. You feel justified in your actions because you have been hurt. Retaliation can be direct by blatently score-keeping; this is when you are purposely nasty. It can also be indirect by behaving in a passive-aggressive manner, which is when you don't say or do something you should.
5. You start to withdraw. You become emotionally unavailable and either shut down completely or remove yourself from one aspect of intimacy. You stop listening or participating in the relationship at any real level. This can be motivated by fear of conflict, difficulty in being vulnerable to your spouse or just feeling a sense of hopelessness that anything can change.
6. You start making concessions. This is when you agree to do something you don't really want to do. You might do this because you believe you are being supportive of something your partner really wants. Most often, it's because you are trying to stop a fight, avoid a fight, don't want to make your partner mad or are afraid you're partner might leave. No matter the reason, the end result will always be harmful in the long run.
7. You have to justify your actions. This is a minor form of retaliation and is often less intentional. It is when you don't do something you know you should and then you provide self-serving reasons why this is okay. You didn't come home at the time you said you would but it's okay because you're an adult and you're entitled to some fun. Besides, your partner spent the weekend at her mother's and you had to do everything at home.