Sometimes it's the little things that make us think twice about our relationship.
If you find yourself thinking about ending your relationship, then there is probably something going on that is telling you to take a moment and pause. And that's OK.
Sometimes we need to do that to make sure we are on the right and healthy path of our relationship and if not, making a second look or a pause is needed.
And it's often the little things that you can't always put your finger on and not the blatant stuff staring you in the face that makes you feel that something is not just quite right and feels a little "off."
Here are 14 reasons that are often relationship killers that can lead to breakups:
1. You do all the heavy lifting.
You're the one who gives more to the relationship and it's beginning to drain on you. You're the one that suggests things, is emotionally available, and working on and for the relationship. Your partner doesn't show up and if he/she does, not all that often.
2. The fun is gone.
In the beginning, it was enough just to be together. And you had fun and a lot of it! You were both curious about one another and doing fun things.
Now, the relationship has resorted to watching Netflix and hanging out and that's it. You have created a routine where there is little curiosity about the other person. There is no energy around the relationship.
3. You don't miss them.
You don't think about the person when you're not with them. When away from the person, they have become more of an afterthought. When thinking about what to do after work, they're not the first person that comes to mind.
4. You're not bothered if plans fall through.
Ahh... indifference. The bane of a relationship. You become complacent. The relationship becomes an afterthought.
5. You have different priorities.
You might be on different paths and want different things from life. Your priorities and where you see yourself going are no longer similar.
6. You're waiting for one another to change.
You constantly think, if only he/she would change then the relationship could improve. Instead of thinking that it's no longer a good fit — for whatever reason — you stay and wait.
7. You would rather be with someone than alone.
8. The little things have now become the big things.
They've started to add up.
9. You would rather be with friends than your partner.
Doing something with your friends is the first thought when you want to do something. Your partner is no longer on the forefront of your mind...
10. Sex has become mundane and feels like an obligation.
Your mind goes somewhere else while having sex and you don't get any pleasure out of it.
11. Your friends and family do not like your partner.
Your friends and family do not like your partner or vice versa. This causes strife and difficulty, including all the important people in your life. Your family and friends complain about him/her. They see things that you cannot. They can also see your unhappiness.
12. Your circular arguments cannot be resolved.
You're not interested in resolving them. You find yourself arguing over the same things.
13. You have a gut feeling of being unhappy.
You really feel unhappy, but can't put your finger on it. It's an internal feeling that will not go away. You might experience some happiness, but this dissipates quickly only for the sad and unhappy feelings to return.
14. There's a constant push and pull of wanting to stay/leave the relationship.
The emotional rollercoaster of the relationship makes you question how you feel about this person. And truthfully, a relationship shouldn't be this way.
You shouldn't be questioning the relationship to the degree that you are doing. It should feel more organic. If you are questioning it or you or the fit, then it's time to get out.
Do any of these ring a bell with you in your relationship? If they do, what will you do about them? Is it time for you to move on?