We're women. We're famous for it. We hide our power, give it away, put ourselves down, hold ourselves back or we don't acknowledge our own real power at all. We often avoid acknowledging our power to shine, to make the most of our lives, to accept and to feel that we truly deserve the best life for ourselves. Finding Your Inner Mentor: A Workshop
I'm not talking about the outdated macho definition of power such as having "power over" someone or having "power through" something difficult. Not that power. I'm also not talking about the confidence and bold courage we earn as we feel our fears and take steps anyway. I'm referring to the power that comes from living a life in line with our values, knowing our goals, and the REAL reasons we want to accomplish them.
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It's the electric current fueled by our soul. It's that inner knowing of what we want, what we are here to do, and why that gives you the feeling that you can do anything. Unfortunately, all too often, we give our power away or hide it. We've become really good at finding creative ways to do it. For example, we say "I think" rather than "I know." Can A Woman Be Both Powerful And Feminine?
Here are some common ways you may give your power away or hide it:
- By taking on additional responsibilities at work even though you know your work week is already looking like you'll be putting in sixty hours.
- By making small money mistakes like spending money on something trendy or something you don't need "just because" rather than paying off debt or investing in an retirement plan.
- By being the volunteer always sought out because you always say "yes", even when you don't really want to because you can't stand the guilt of saying "no."
- By procrastinating or avoiding an uncomfortable but necessary conversation because you dislike conflict. 5 Relationship Skills For Resolving Conflicts
- By getting together with "friends" that you really don't enjoy spending time with anymore. These relationships feel draining to you, but you feel like you have to follow "tradition."
- By not speaking up when you feel uncomfortable around the office gossip, the inappropriate joke teller, the cheesy flirt or the racist.
- By saying "yes" to a date or work assignment that you're not really interested in or staying in a relationship or job that you know is no longer good for you.
- By loaning money to friends or family when you don't have it to give or when you know you're going to sink your own financial plan by doing so. 5 Ways To Make Your Marriage More Important Than Money
- By "up-talking." Have you ever heard a young woman or young person wanting to sound "cool" by raising their voice a little? I mean, at the end of every sentence! They often times sound like they are asking a question even though most of the time, they are telling actual facts. "Up-talking" is a term I coined myself that is popular among women who aren't so sure of themselves.