Is Your Relationship The Reason For Your Depression?

By

Is Your Relationship The Reason For Your Depression?
It’s not your relationship. Want to know the real reason for your depression? Read on.

So how do you get out of this downward spiral? First, understand that you have created this depressive behavior for a reason. This is not because I want you to blame yourself for the situation you are in. Of course not! You didn’t know you were doing this. How is it your fault? Don’t blame yourself. But now that you know, take full responsibility for your happiness. [To stay in touch with Kim, sign up for her free newsletter.] 

If you are unhappy, you owe it to yourself to first ask for what you want. If that works, then you won’t have a need for the depression anymore. If your husband doesn’t make the change you request, and he may not because doing it the way he’s been doing has obviously worked for him in some way, then you might want to look at what you can do to create your own happiness.

If you don’t get what you want, then accept, without anger or resentment, that your husband is doing what he needs to do to get his own needs met. His job after all is to meet his needs. Guess whose job it is to meet yours? That’s right! It’s your job. So now there are three and a half options left to you.

  1. You can change or adjust what you want.
  2. You can change your perception. So if you are telling yourself a story that your husband doesn’t love you enough, change your story.
  3. You can do something different.
  4. (or 3.5)  As the Rolling Stones told us years ago, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need.” [For a more descriptive understanding of your needs, check out Kim’s free report on InsideOut Thinking]
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Kim Olver

Speaker/Presenter

Kim Olver, LCPC, has been featured in Whole Living, Women's World, Fitness Magazine and Counseling Today and is the best-selling, award winning author of Secrets of Happy Couples: Loving Yourself, Your Partner, and Your Life.

Connect with Kim by signing up for her FREE InsideOut Relationship Advice Newsletter and receive a FREE recording about our Life Changing Process, InsideOut Empowerment and have access to FREE relationship assessments.

Check out new products that might be for you in my Webstore

Location: Country Club Hills (Chicago), IL
Credentials: LCPC, MS, NCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Empowering Women
Other Articles/News by Kim Olver:

How To Be Happy: It's An InsideOut Job

By

The reason most people feel unhappy is that they are in search of this illusive happiness that is somehow found outside of them in things they acquire, people they want and experiences they have. While these things can bring temporary pleasure, if you are seeking true happiness, it’s an InsideOut job. See the seven steps on how to be happy and ... Read more

The Cheerios Commercial: Is Interracial Marriage Still Taboo?

By

As a person who has been in an interracial relationship, I was so encouraged to see the newest Cheerios commercial star a Caucasian mother, an African American father and their adorable biracial little girl. When the media begins to depict different types of families, the public may be exposed to difference in a way they wouldn't otherwise and exposure can ... Read more

Why You Should Never 'Reward' Your Boyfriend With Sex

By

According to The Daily Mail, new research says that two-thirds of British women admit using sex to reward their partner for good behavior, with helping around the home being the most common reason they reward their partners in the bedroom. For generations and generations, men and women have been attempting to control each others' behavior. We ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB