6 Myths About Sex After 50

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Myths About Sex After 50
There's no age cap on a healthy sexual life.

4. Sex will be less frequent when we’re older.

False: This depends on the individual. Some will continue to have sex daily or twice daily, as they always did, and others will have sex monthly as they always did. Many people start new relationships in their 50s, and they report that they are having just as much sex as they did when they fell in love at age 21!

5. Sex must involve intercourse and orgasm.

False: It is a Western fallacy that "real" sex is intercourse and foreplay is not really part of it—or just something to do before you marry. Touching, kissing, stroking and licking are all sexual activity and are extremely enjoyable. For some it is exactly what they want. Making an orgasm the goal puts too much pressure on us, and we have enough of that in our lives.

6. Health problems and menopause will end our sexual life.

False: Of course our bodies age and we may want to do things differently, but that is no reason to stop us! It’s important if you are having difficulties having sex or you’ve been ill to talk to your doctor. But here's a fact: sex puts no more strain on the heart that walking up the stairs. If you're worried about your bodily changes, many women find that some sexual challenges can easily be helped with lubricant.

... How many did you get right? 

Just one word of caution: you shouldn’t compare yourself to a 20-year-old! We tend to do this in relation to our physical selves. I’m sure you can’t run as fast as you once did, and I expect you’ve got a wrinkle or two. But there are so many emotional and practical ways in which you’re vastly more sophisticated and able than you once were. It’s time we accepted that things are different now that we’re older and for the most part, they are pretty good.

See my articles on relationships for over-50s: How to cope if you're over 50 and your husband is "boring!"

I run workshops and offer coaching sessions on relationships, love and sex, health and wellbeing see my website: www.experiencematters.org.uk

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