The Confident Woman’s Guide To Being Single

Photo: weheartit
The Confident Woman’s Guide To Being Single

There's one relationship you must master before any others will work out.

Congratulations — you're a single woman rocking your confidence. The world is your oyster.

You possess a trait that's highly sought after in friendship, romance, and business.

While most women seek approval from others to determine their worth, you know self-confidence has nothing to do with anyone else's opinion.

It’s all about developing a healthy relationship with yourself. It's about cultivating self-acceptance, self-love, self-respect, and a healthy self-image that equate to a strong belief in yourself, regardless of circumstance.

Of course, you may feel more confident in some situations than others, but you stand on a sturdy foundation of knowing you're enough. You're intelligent, sexy, compassionate and responsible for your own happiness. And you have ways to quickly pick yourself up in difficult times.

Or, maybe this ISN'T you ... (yet). Maybe you're still developing your self-confidence.  

If so, here are 15 ways to become one of those amazingly confident women the world can't help but adore: 

1. Make good use of your "Me-Time"

Your single status has plenty of perks and one of the best is more me-time. You know what feeds your soul and nourishes your mind.

Treat yourself to an exotic cruise, a walk in nature, or a simple bubble bath at home. Enjoy your favorite things, fill your space with flowers and romantic candles. Buy sexy lingerie for yourself instead of a boyfriend.

You show people the right way to treat you through what you allow and don't allow. Treat yourself the way you deserve, and others will follow your lead.

2. Let your intuition choose your friends

While many will find you the perfect friend or role model, an insecure few will attempt to douse your fire. Your energy is attractive to all kinds of people.

Trust your intuition to determine who is a good fit for you. Some are challenging and help you grow, but you’ve come too far to have your passion snuffed or settle for less than you deserve.

3. Refuse to play small

Many women underplay their intelligence or confidence so as not to threaten a less-than-confident man.

First of all, in a healthy relationship, romance increases when it aligns with your values and supports your strength. But, you don’t need a man-shaped project to clutter up your life. Keep your focus clearly on what you want, and be your full, capable self at all times.

4. Seek out solo adventures

You have what it takes to enjoy life to the fullest even you have yet to attract the friends to do it with. Don't wait for them, enjoy life now. There is much to gain from some solo adventures.

You meet different types of people when you’re solo and confident because your energy stands on its own and is not muddled, as it is with friends — even good, positive ones.

5. Recognize your power and influence

Society is programmed to view singles as missing some piece of themselves. That's why your confidence is intriguing and eye-opening to others. People want what you have, even if they can’t put their finger on what it is.

You are different in a powerful, attractive way regardless of your physical appearance. You have the glow other women dream of seeing in the mirror. You exude the courage that inspires them to step into their power. You rarely get bogged down by criticism from others because who you are speaks louder than what others say.

6. Indulge in self-care rituals that protect your confidence

Determine which activities — mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual — keep you strong. And vow to make them priorities in your life — single or not.

Check in with your emotions frequently to know which people and situations empower you. Keep the ones that do, and move away from those that don’t.

7. Enforce healthy boundaries

Only women with healthy self-esteem can successfully enforce healthy boundaries that keep them safe. Determine what is acceptable to you and what isn’t. Everything from making time daily for self-care to what you say or do if someone speaks to you disrespectfully.

Every woman has struggled with enforcing boundaries due to self-worth issues, so congratulate yourself for knowing your value.

8. Write down your thoughts and feelings 

Journaling is great for clarity and can magnetize solutions very quickly if you’re feeling stuck or off-balance.

When you date or enter into a relationship, journal how you’re feeling about yourself along the way. This is a great way to protect your confidence even when your emotions shut down your brain. You will have a heads up if something is unhealthy, making it easier to address issues early on.

Notice if you are writing down excuses for his less than stellar behavior or about the moment you knew you were in love.

9. Let go of old hurts

Find the lessons in every situation, even bad breakups. Once you learn the lesson, you don’t have to repeat it.

Allow yourself to love your past, scars and all, because it got you where you are now. Release any leftover pain, resentment, or guilt. Those just cloud your future and keep you from being your best.

10. Schedule time with friends regularly

Spending time with positive, supportive friends is something you need to do whether single or taken, and now is the perfect time to cultivate those friendships.

Do things together that make you laugh and talk about what you love, rather than complaining. If you feel the need to vent, follow up with something fun to raise your energy again.

11. Workout consistently

Exercise your body. You’re nothing without it — literally. Figure out what foods fuel your health and reduce or delete the ones that don’t.

The good news is, physical illness is directly related to emotions so your confidence boosts your physical health. Notice how your body feels throughout the day and visualize it strong and happy, just the way you want it.

12. Nurture your spirit

Meditate, pray, do yoga, listen to guided visualizations, swim, run, read empowering books. Do whatever makes you feel whole.  

Keep your spiritual connection constant. It will carry you through the most difficult times and help you become an intuitive, powerful woman with high values and great character.

13. Laugh ... a lot

Watch movies and videos that make you laugh. Laughter heals mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. A 4-year-old laughs an average of 300 times per day, but a 40-year old laughs only FOUR times per day

Make laughing a priority and require it in your next relationship. It changes the chemistry in your body and improves your overall health.

14. Give back to others

Contribute to those you can inspire. People need inspiration above all else. They need to feel good about themselves and their life and few truly do as they play into unreachable societal standards and live in drama and self-doubt.

Remember your gift of influence and use it to help others develop an unshakable foundation for their own self-confidence.  

15. Ask for what you want

You get what you expect, so place a very specific order with the universe, God, or your higher self. Then, watch and listen for its delivery and graciously accept it upon arrival. Most people want things, but aim small and still don’t feel worthy when they receive their order, so they miss it and say asking for what they want didn’t work.

Include the level of health you want, the type of relationship you want ... you know the kind that makes you laugh every day and tingle when he touches you. You think a life like that doesn't exist, but it does. And you deserve a life just like that. 

And there you go, 15 ways to have fun being a confident, single woman. Live it up!

Kelly Rudolph is a Confidence Coach and founder of Positive Women Rock. She gives women the tools to get from stuck and stressed to inspired and confident. Connect with her and get her free Life Strategies at


Explore YourTango