He wasn’t trying to tell me I was to blame. He was honestly telling me exactly what I needed to hear in a way that no one else had the guts to tell me. Understanding that released the hurt I had been carrying around, thinking my dad had betrayed me. For the first time I understood that my dad may not be the softest in his delivery, but he wants me to be happy and has my best interest at heart.
When I replayed the conversation my dad and I had a year prior, I saw it in a whole new light. He was expressing “I know you are hurt and in pain from this break up, but you can change it. Help yourself by taking responsibility for your part.” At that time I wasn’t willing to see that I was responsible for my part in the relationship.
It was difficult, but important for me to hear that. The truth can hurt, but it can also set you free depending on how YOU take it.
Since that glorious moment I gained a better understanding and appreciation for my dad. He spoke in love that day, but I didn’t want to listen because he didn’t say it in a way I liked. Now I look for the root of what he is saying to me because I now know he just wants pure happiness for me.
This understanding opened me up! I was able to trust Hemal again, and knew he was the man I wanted to marry!
This week’s Lovework:
Take a look at the conversations you have had with your dad. They may be great, or maybe not. See if you can begin to exercise the art of reading between the lines.
Our dads are human beings, just like us, that make mistakes. They may even make a lot of mistakes, but they are trying. I challenge you to place yourself in his shoes for just a moment, because the way you view men has a lot to do with how you view your father.
This can be a touchy subject. I know.
I wanted to reveal my story today as a way to open up the doors to conversation. I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Click the link to the blog and leave your comments!