Love

5 Tiny Things Every Couple Needs For Knock-Your-Socks-Off Love

Photo: Vera Prokhorova / Shutterstock
guy kissing girl while cuddling

Everyone wants a deeply satisfying love life and relationship — an extraordinary one based on true love. But what is true love? Finding and falling in love with the mate of your dreams is one thing, but unfortunately, not every couple will be able to do the work to create a lasting relationship.

Building the kind of relationship that can weather any storm, fill your heart beyond measure, and exceed all your expectations for a deep and meaningful connection sometimes seems crazily unattainable…right? You need to know that true love is attainable if you are focused on the components essential for an amazing love life. If that's the case, then you are on your way to a loving and healthy relationship!

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Here are the 5 tiny things every couple needs for knock-your-socks-off love:

1. Chemistry

This is that hot, steamy, magnetic pull you have for each other. Intimacy is vital in relationships and you cannot create that physical attraction. It is either there or it isn’t. Chemistry is not something that can be simply worked on. You either feel that intense physical desire for your partner or you don’t. And kind of feeling it is not enough.

Let me tell you from personal experience, I have downplayed this component, thinking that the deeper emotional connection and love mattered more. But, in the end, (and yes that relationship inevitably ended) the lack of desire and chemistry that I felt led to the demise of the relationship. For love to truly last, each partner needs to make the other feel wanted and desired physically — and that is not something that you can do if the underlying attraction isn’t palpable.

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2. Connection

This is the feeling of being intertwined mentally and emotionally, of sharing a profound understanding perhaps from past experiences, shared values, or similar goals and dreams. Have you felt that you know someone deeply to their core or feel like you have known them for years? That is the bond I’m talking about. When you love someone, you have a sense that you "get each other," where conversations flow, and there is even an unspoken understanding and bond that unifies you.

   

   

3. Companionship

This is the pure enjoyment of each other’s company in a relationship. It is the simple pleasure of spending time together as friends because you truly relish being together. It should not be a chore or an obligation to spend time together. In true companionship, you love hanging out with each other. You have fun, laugh, enjoy the silliness, share stories and feelings, and genuinely want to be with one another.

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4. Compassion

This is the heartfelt concern for each other’s well-being. When you have true compassion for one another, you want to see your partner genuinely happy. You want to see your partner’s feelings treasured and nurtured. When your partner hurts, you deeply hurt them. This is real love. Rather than wanting your partner to fill all your needs, it becomes equally important to you that your partner feels loved, and nurtured, and that their needs are satisfied.

   

   

5. Communication

This is the skill needed to speak openly with each other. You need to be willing to speak honestly, share your thoughts, and be unafraid to open up about your feelings. Good communication also means speaking to each other in a non-accusatory way with language that does not insult or hurt, but rather seeks to bridge the gaps of understanding and offers clarity and insight. It is equally important to be the kind of partner who does not pass judgment. Ratherlistenns attentively, with an open mind and an open heart.

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Karen Webb is an in-demand architect, author, entrepreneur business expert, speaker, and women’s empowerment advocate.