We're being tongue-in-cheek here. Well, sort of.
When you're in the middle of a divorce, it's hard to believe that there could be an upshot to all the pain you're going through. But once you're able to put a little distance between you and your ex, stepping back and even seeing a bit of humor in the situation can be a really good thing. Good for your soul, and good for your health.
In the spirit of lightening your mood and improving your health, take a look at these seven positives. Hopefully they'll make you laugh. But, sadly enough, they might just also ring true:
1. Divorce is the best diet plan on the planet.
You don’t have to count calories. You don’t have to worry about drinking chalky shakes or buying any special food because you can’t eat it anyway. All you have to do is start your divorce and, BOOM! You will automatically lose your appetite and begin losing more weight than you ever thought possible.
2. Divorce automatically un-clutters your house.
It finally gives you a reason to go through the boxes in the basement that you haven’t touched in years, and a deadline by which you have to get it done. What’s more, once half of your stuff is gone, the house has way more room in it.
3. Divorce forces you to learn new technology.
Once you have put your divorce behind you, opportunities abound to expand your technological skills. Suddenly you find yourself having to learn to navigate Match.com, EHarmony and, if you are really brave, Tinder!
4. Divorce provides a legitimate excuse to go shopping.
Being newly-single creates a whole new social life that requires a suitable wardrobe to match. (Besides, you have now lost so much weight that none of your clothes fit anyway.) All the more reason to upgrade your wardrobe.
5. Divorce can broaden your musical horizons.
No matter what kind of music you listened to while you were married, you will suddenly find yourself compelled to blast out Carrie Underwood’s "Before He Cheats," Cee Lo Green’s “Forget You,” or “Let it Go” from Disney’s Frozen. (And of course, don’t forget "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor (for women) and “She Got the Gold Mine, I Got the Shaft" by Jerry Reed (for men).)
6. Divorce encourages you to exercise.
Even if you haven’t exercised in years, once you start the divorce process, your ex’s behavior—as well as the antics of his/her new squeeze—could very well inspire you to want to take up kickboxing, karate, or some other type of full-body contact sport. Or, you may try to rise above your anger and go the more "Zen" route, in which case you may discover yoga, tai chi and Qigong.
7. Divorce Can Make You Feel Young Again.
After you get done paying the lawyers, the movers, the therapists, and everything else involved in your divorce, the amount of money left in your bank account will likely be smaller than anything you have seen since you were in your early 20s! It will truly make you feel like you are young all over again.
For most of us, divorce is serious and divorce is tough. But, every now and then, whenever you can manage it, you just have to laugh.
To get more (serious) divorce advice from Karen Covy, visit her website.
This article was originally published at Karen Covy's blog. Reprinted with permission from the author.