Do you have a realistic idea of what you're looking for in a partner, or is a fairy tale running the show? How often do you stop to consider exactly what you want and why? How conscious are you when it comes to looking for that "special someone"?
Are you aware of the power of setting goals? Any book or seminar on goal setting will tell you the importance of clear, concise goals. When you're clear about what you want, the universal forces (or your unconscious) will assist you in manifesting exactly what you want, at just the right time.
Finding a life partner is not something we should do haphazardly, it's too important. Most relationships don't seem to last very long. We find ourselves attracted to someone, begin to get to know them, get physically involved, then find out we don't want to be with that person. At that point a lot has been invested, emotionally, physically, and time wise, and it's painful for one or both to part ways.
One way to avoid some of that heartache is to be very clear about what you're looking for. Then don't let your heart and hormones take over for your brain.
So, here's a recipe for manifesting your perfect partner.
First, write down the things that you're generally attracted to--when you first see someone as well as when you first talk. Be honest here. If you like cowboy boots, write it down. Set this list aside to look at when you're all done.
The next step is to sit quietly, with no possibility of interruptions, and close your eyes. Calm your mind then ask yourself, "What do I want?" This isn't about what traits or qualities you're looking for yet. It's about what exactly do you want? Do you really want a partner? Or just someone to hang out with. If you want a partner, is that for marriage, or just a long-term, committed dating situation? It's important to get clear about this so you can move on to the next step. You may be surprised at your answer if you allow yourself to be truthful. Now, with that in mind, what qualities and traits do you want this person to have? Let your list grow freely and don't judge your answers. Dream big, be silly, write everything down. If you're looking for marriage, your list will probably be longer than if you're looking for someone to hang out with. When you can't think of any more, keep writing. Fill the page. I have fifty-nine items on my list. One of them is well-manicured hands and feet. Silly? Maybe, but it's important to me. Just keep writing.
After you feel you really have completed your list, go through and pick the things that absolutely must be in place when you meet this person. An example would be integrity. That’s something that, generally, as an adult, a person already has, or not. My list had eight items. This is the list you carry around with you. Give a copy to a trusted friend. If any of these things are missing, you must say good-bye to any new person you meet. If you don’t, you’re not being true to yourself and you’ll pay for it later.
Then, go back to the long list and find the items that you must have, but could come later. I happen to want a world traveler. I could probably teach someone the joys of traveling the world later on. This is not about changing someone, however. No home improvement projects allowed. Get these lists out frequently so you can remind yourself that you’re looking for more than just a pretty face. Stay in touch with your friend who has the “must have” list. Be honest with them about whether or not the new person you’re dating has these qualities and traits. If not, say good-bye and keep searching. Use your friend as support. If you’re clear and firm about this, you won’t waste time and you’ll manifest your perfect partner much sooner.
From my heart to yours, Kara Oh
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