When you notice you’re focusing on the hurt, humiliation or loss, for example, replace that thought with something that will shift your energy. You can turn on a funny movie, pick up a novel that really gets you sucked into the story, go out in nature, exercise, call a friend and ask them what’s going on in their life, not what is going on in yours, offer your time to a charitable organization, be with children, pets, whatever will take your mind off of your uncomfortable thoughts, at least for a time.
Yes, those thoughts will come back, but the more you take charge and purposefully shift your thoughts from those that make you feel bad to those that make you feel good, you will more quickly move through the emotional crisis. You will also gain a lifelong skill.
6. Once you are past the worst of it, begin to get out. Make dates with girlfriends but don’t talk about your break up. Sign up for dancing lessons, or something that will be fun and get you out socializing. Register for a matching service and just date to be dating, not because you’re desperately looking for a replacement.
The most important point I want to make here is that you’re in charge of how you react and respond to whatever happens to you. If you can begin to take charge of what you’re feeling and begin to purposefully choose what you’re thinking, you will move through heartbreak much more quickly.
I feel it is a waste of a heartbreaking experience not to learn the lessons that are waiting to be unearthed. By doing the above exercises, you will always learn the lessons that are there, waiting for you. When you do, you will grow, you will become wiser, and you will move ever closer to having more amazing experiences from dinner out with a girlfriend to a deeply loving romantic relationship. We are ever evolving, always moving toward the best version of ourselves. You get to choose how you respond to life.
From my heart to yours,
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