A women wrote to me with the following: I am in relation for last 4 years. He loves me, cares about me, and says he wants to spend his whole life with me. But he is not ready to get engaged and that kills me. I have tried alot to change his mind but I’ve failed. He says he still needs time. If he loves me then what’s the reason stoping him from engagement?
Here’s my response to her and any woman who is trying to push a man into marriage:
You will for sure push him away if you keep trying to get him to ask you to marry him. He will do it when he’s ready, and not before. If you keep pushing, he will realize you are not the right women for him and walk away.
You must understand that he sees marriage as a very serious decision. There is not the romantic fantasy that women see it to be. For him, it means he is taking on the financial responsibility for another adult, and if you’re young, any children you might have. Yes, you work. But he knows that as the wife, you might decide not to work. He takes that as a huge responsibility. And he also sees marriage as being willing to take on the responsibility of your emotional well being and happiness. it’s HUGE for him.
So stop bothering him. Stop making it mean something that he is waiting. You will become an ugly woman to him if you keep pushing him. Just step back and allow things to unfold in their own way, in their own time. It will be much sweeter for you both when he finally comes to the decision on his own. You can’t get him to do it sooner than he’s ready, so stop trying.
There’s a reason I have dedicated the last dozen years to helping women understand how men are different than women. When you fully embrace and honor those differences, your relationships with men will transform. You can learn how to understand men with the secrets about men in Men Made Easy. If you want to find out if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, go to KaraOh.com and sign up to receive my 3 free ebooks.
From my heart to yours,
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