With the world-wide phenomenon that the ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey” trilogy has become it’s impossible to escape the media coverage, the ecstatic fan base and the conversation it’s all stirred up. The most important aspect of these books is the permission they give to read, enjoy and even live out kinky fantasies. If these books have inspired some interest in ‘S&M’ here are some easy ways to introduce it into your sex life.
One of the central themes of the trilogy is dominance and submission. This is a power dynamic where one partner chooses to ‘give up’ control to the other partner. The books take it to a rather intense level, but you can go a little easier. Allowing your lover to ‘order you around’ or vice versa can take on a sensual feeling of letting go. This feeling can lead to a heightened sense of connection and trust.
A simple blindfold can go a long way! By shutting off one of the senses the body is forced to focus on what its feeling. The usual choices for a blind fold are pretty easy to get, in fact you might already have something on hand. A scarf or bandanna, a silk tie, stockings or one of those eye covers you can find in the relaxation aisle of your local drugstore would all do the job. Even just keeping your eyes closed can work, but having something physically deny sight will create a much stronger feeling of vulnerability.
Speaking of vulnerability, light restraint can also add to the experience of giving up control. Again you don’t need any special items to use, a scarf or silk tie (if you’re REALLY into the book, find a special grey silk tie!) even a thin leather belt can be used to take it up a notch. When you start introducing restraint into your sex life be sure to take it in small stages so that everyone feels comfortable. You can always raise the intensity next time!
These can be the first simple steps to exploring your newly inspired kinky curiosity and will give you both you and your lover an opportunity to ease into these kinds of new experiences. Regardless, make sure you have a chance to talk about what the new explorations felt like.