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Give A Shot To The Guys Who Think You're Hot

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Give A Shot To The Guys Who Think You're Hot
TIP: Embrace the reality that a man will only pursue you if he's attracted from the get-go.

Have you ever met a man who really didn't float your boat (visually) at first, but then after you spent some time together he became...adorable?  As a professional matchmaker, http://www.CupidsCoach.com  I've been asking this question to women for over twenty years, and 85% of the women I've surveyed say Yes to this question. The unfortunate reality is that when I ask this very same question to men about women, it's a wholly different scenario; less than 5% of the men I've surveyed say that they can and do develop physical attraction for a woman over time. Oh, my...

We hate this, don't we? It makes us think that men are superficial Shallow Hal's who care only about sex or about having trophy wives to display to the world. But in reality, as much as we want to have equality with men in all ways, this distinction between men and women is just inherent, built right into our biology and theirs.

More from YourTango: When Your Guy's MANNERS Are Lacking...

It makes sense if we think about it - as women, we want our partners to be turned on to us. We want "his equipment" to work and the truth of the matter is that if he's not attracted, his equipment just won't function as designed. No woman wants to be stuck in a relationship with a man who thinks she's...not hot.

As women have gained more and more equality, we're also behaving more like men in the dating arena, targeting the men we're interested in (online and out there in the world) and we're chasing after them more than we have in the history of mankind. Unfortunately, this is a really frustrating and less than fruitful way for you to date, as the bottom line is that you ONLY have a shot at the guy who thinks YOU are hot.

If you're been doing the picking, the ONE thing I'll advise you to change is to make this shift. Respond to and really consider more seriously the men who ARE looking your way, who are initiating contact with you online, who are inviting you out on second dates, as you really DO have a chance with this group of men.

As Cupid's Coach http://www.cupidscoach.com I am working with a gentleman Client at the moment who tends to be attrracted only to super skinny Asian women. Another is a man who really likes a full-figured woman - he digs Kardashian curves. Another has a thing for redheads and another is very attracted to tall, busty women. 

More from YourTango: I Want Love but I HATE Dating

The secret is not to fight it. Like it or not, the guy simply MUST be attracted to you, and if he's not, move on, And the guy who IS knocking at your door - if he has the three or four qualities and attributes on the very top of your Wish List, HE is the one to receive and to encourage.

Give a Shot to the guy who thinks YOU are Hot and you will find your dating life transform.

 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Julie Ferman

Dating Coach

Julie Ferman, Founder

Cupid's Coach

Awarded Best Matchmaker: 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010 by iDate and Online Personals Watch

Location: Westlake Village, CA
Credentials: Other
Specialties: Dating/Being Single Support, Life Management, Matchmaking
Other Articles/News by Julie Ferman:

When Your Guy's MANNERS Are Lacking...

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As a personal matchmaker, http://www.CupidsCoach.com MANNERS are a frequent topic of discussion. My personal matchmaking client, Maria asked me if she should dump the new guy she's been seeing, because she says his "manners are lacking" -- Let's explore what he did that disappointed her and what the fix might ... Read more

I Want Love but I HATE Dating

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Here's a question I ask each of my personal matchmaking clients: What if your next first date would be the last one of your entilre life? What if that person were to be The One you've been hoping to find and then your dating days would be over forever.  Would you feel like you missed out on a bunch of great dating experiences or would it ... Read more

How To Be Irresistible To Men

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Men crave us. They do, really. Study after study has shown that the happiest men are those who are in a loving relationship. How to be irrestible to men, so you can be found by that man who wants a loving partnership? Smile. The number one thing you simply must know about how to be irresistible to a man is to use your natural smile, ... Read more

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