Rather than having self-esteem based on the elusive pursuit of constant success and alleged perfection, you instead practice self-acceptance that lovingly accepts yourself where you are at now -- allowing yourself to make positive changes where you would like to, but without making room for dwelling on judgmental thoughts and feelings. Self-acceptance consequently means completely letting go of self-criticism. Rather than basing your value on performance, it instead involves unconditional self-acceptance -- warts and all.
This approach is in no way in conflict with introspection, personal development, or becoming a more caring person, because it sets up a loving environment where that kind of growth becomes possible. It entails recognizing what your values and goals are, and taking effective steps to pursue them. While you won’t be able to stop your thinking mind from providing ongoing judgments of yourself and others, you can stop buying into them and instead mindfully connect with where you are, what you are doing, and what you truly value in life, and then take effective action to live accordingly.
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