Holidays, And 7 Other Things To Change Post-Divorce

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Holidays, And 7 Other Things To Change Post-Divorce
Don't be dogged by the ghost of Christmas past. Bring new life to the New Year post-divorce.

5. Relationships. Whether it's how you handle your relationships with friends or how you relate to your children, couples tend to morph into the same patterns. You can break out of those patterns now. Want to have your friends over for a game of Bunco or poker on a school night?  Want to spend Saturday night with your kids watching movies and eating nachos in bed? Go ahead. These are all choices you can make.
6. Work. How much time we spend at work is often a flashpoint for couples. Somehow, one's own work always seems infinitely more important than one's spouse's. Now it really is. Maybe those extra hours you put in to be able to afford the luxury vacation no longer seem worth it. When you perform those labors of love at home like laundry, grocery shopping and cooking are also things over which you now have decision-making power. It's all about figuring out what works for you.
7. Vacations. Vacations can be very challenging in the newly single. Sometimes it's difficult to imagine a solo vacation, or a family vacation without two parents. Decide what your dream vacation is and what you can manage. Ask the kids what they want. Travel with a friend, a sibling or anyone who will be fun, or go it alone. But be sure to schedule a break from work, even if it's to stay at home and relax.
8. Holidays. Holidays and other celebrations, like birthdays, tend to be tradition-bound. This is the time to create your own traditions and decide how you'd like to do things. There are no rules. If you can't afford those expensive gifts this year, no worries, people will understand. If you can afford that trip to the Bahamas for the holidays, why not? Want to stay at home? Visit friends? Go to the movies? Anything goes.

Don't eat caviar on New Year's Eve if you're a nuts and granola kind of person. Don't continue to act like a fancy poodle if you're really a down and dirty hound at heart. Figure out the authentic you…and be yourself.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Judith Tutin

Life Coach

Judith Tutin, PhD, ACC

Location: Rome, GA
Credentials: ACC, PhD
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