Don't Get Burned By Your Post-Divorce Anger
By Dr. Judith Tutin. Posted on .
• Bad decision blocking. One way to respond with care is to moderate electronic communications carefully. They can be left in draft form while you decide whether or not to send, or even written with no intention to ever send. Do not send while angry, stressed or drinking. If necessary, there's an app for your phone. And no Facebook stalking. When communicating in real-time, don't start a conversation you know will involve conflict when you’re in a hurry or feeling stressed out. There's no app for this, but thank you caller ID
• Kindness. As we say in the South, kill him with kindness. This is not meant to be taken literally. Remember, you don't always have to say what you think out loud. It's often best not to. Mindfulness, especially the loving kindness meditation, where you express loving thoughts toward yourself and others, is great for cultivating a kinder, gentler you. Emphasize the bit in loving kindness where you focus on someone you definitely don't love.
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As the Buddha purportedly said, Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else…You are the one who gets burned. Keep that in mind and be cool.
