Changes, unexpected or planned, occur when course corrections are needed to move you closer to living your true life. What if you could actually thrive instead of struggling? Rather than hanging by your fingernails, filled with confusion and trepidation, can you release your grip?
I used to say I loved change until I realized I only loved the change I initiated being much less thrilled with unexpected changes. When confronted with unexpected change, do you jump to what you’ll lose, convinced that what is ahead will be worse than what you have now?
When the pain of loss arises, do you quickly attempt to avoid it at all costs even though those costs are huge? Efforts to block the grieving process using the many faces of fear, i.e., control, stubbornness, procrastination, negativity, busyness/constant motion, excuses, and resistance, only serve to deepen the discomfort. Sending the pain underground will, at some point, cause an unexpected eruption leaving you and witnesses confused and astounded.
Navigating the white waters of change in new ways can reduce stress and increase clarity leading to boundless joy, peace and ease. These ideas show how to morph these fears into excitement:
1. Fear, an acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real, is always future based and a lie. Return to the current moment, where things are always fine.
2. Lovingly embrace your feelings allowing them to surface and dissipate.
3. Review the outcomes of the transitions you’ve experienced. What gifts and blessings have you received that you couldn’t have imagined?
4. Acknowledge the gifts you’ve received from the people, places and things of your past that will always be with you to lift your spirits and support your next steps.
5. There are no right or wrong decisions, only choices you make with available information. As you follow your chosen path, more data is gathered guiding your next choices including course corrections. Nothing is forever and you are always at choice.
6. Increase your faith, peace and connection with you and/or God/Spirit, however you define that, through journaling, spending time in nature, meditation or whatever brings you peace.
7. Understand that all changes are invitations to living more fully from your authentic self and purpose.
Limbo and the Field of All Possibilities
Our culture has great difficulty with being in limbo. Although the most effective way to relate to the limbo experience is to get still, go within and listen, the temptation to hurriedly make something happen provides the perfect distraction to bury those uncomfortable feelings. A painting in my home says “Don’t push the river, it will flow at its own pace” reinforces that slowing down, listening and feeling your rhythm reinforces trusting that all is unfolding in perfected timing.
Your desires are your soul’s longings guiding you to enjoy this time of spaciousness. Deepak Chopra calls this void “the field of all possibilities” – the richest, most creative place there is. The soul communicates through your feelings –the light feelings reflect your truth, while the heavy feelings are the lies you’ve told yourself. Partaking of the luxury, no, the necessity, of the creative gifts available during this time is self-nurturing of the highest order.
While the wonder and excitement of new beginnings and uncharted waters is both exhilarating and scary, you are being stretched and challenged to become more of who you really are. Continuing to move toward the essence of your dreams, without attachment to the timing or form they might take, provides for new experiences to unfold beyond your wildest imaginings.
While this process appears linear, it’s really quite fluid. Grief can be dancing with flashes of creativity as glimpses of new possibilities arise. Allowing whatever comes up to flow through you with little or no resistance guarantees an incredible ride. Everything that was nailed down is coming loose so you can stand in your truth, fly with spirit and steer with your heart.